Jan. 1, 2026

Off The Record:Fighting Chickens, Arguing Words, Eating People

Off The Record:Fighting Chickens, Arguing Words, Eating People

Send in your music story! A cozy studio, too many Christmas decorations, and a pair of friends ready to argue about everything that matters—and a lot that doesn’t. We launch with a ridiculous “would you rather” (fight a chicken at every car door or one lion a year) and somehow end up in a serious conversation about risk, survival instincts, and how people make decisions when nothing is simple. Along the way, we get loud about regional dialects (Appalachia or Appalachian, creek or crick, pen o...

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Send in your music story!

A cozy studio, too many Christmas decorations, and a pair of friends ready to argue about everything that matters—and a lot that doesn’t. We launch with a ridiculous “would you rather” (fight a chicken at every car door or one lion a year) and somehow end up in a serious conversation about risk, survival instincts, and how people make decisions when nothing is simple. Along the way, we get loud about regional dialects (Appalachia or Appalachian, creek or crick, pen or pin) because words are culture, and culture is identity.

The conversation swerves into holiday classics, Cars rankings, and a quick tour of unlikely music heroes before the controllers come out. Red Dead Redemption 2 gets both love and side-eye for its pacing and punishing randomness. Bethesda fans will feel seen, with Fallout 4 faction hot takes and a confession that side quests often beat main plots. Then we pivot to Pokémon: performance issues in Scarlet and Violet contrasted with a newer entry’s surprisingly moving side missions about grief, neglect, and second chances—proof that “kids’ games” can carry real weight.

Food and bodies take the spotlight in a way that’s fun and a little alarming. We laugh at “now with real potatoes,” retell the great nugget switch to “real chicken,” and talk about trust and labels. A sticky vs onion-smell hypothetical opens a deeper riff on scent and attraction, including how birth control might change what we think we like. Mortality enters the chat with a debate over knowing the date or cause of your death, full-body scans, and the psychology of avoidance vs certainty. Things get darkly funny with cannibalism as a test case for ethics and preparation—stew or steak—only to return to real life with ghosts, late-night screams, and when to call or step in.

It’s messy, fast, and very human: a comedy-led ride that keeps landing on choice, consequence, and what our weird opinions say about us. If you love gaming debates, regional language quirks, and jokes that sneak into real questions, you’ll feel right at home. Subscribe, drop your pick—lion or chicken—and leave a review with your favorite wrong pronunciation. We’ll read the spiciest ones next time.

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Please give us a quick rate and review. If you enjoyed the audio version head over to our Youtube for video content! Follow the Instagram for special content and weekly updates. Check out our website and leave us a voice message to be heard on the show or find out more about the guests!

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https://www.thehookandbridgepodcast.com/

Please give us a quick rate and review. If you enjoyed the audio version head over to our Youtube for video content! Follow the Instagram for special content and weekly updates. Check out our website and leave us a voice message to be heard on the show or find out more about the guests!

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCONMXkuIfpVizopNb_CoIGg

https://www.instagram.com/hook_and_bridge_podcast/

https://www.thehookandbridgepodcast.com/

01:10 - House Setup And Holiday Clutter

04:38 - Chicken Vs Lion And Bear Dilemmas

08:20 - Pronunciation Fights And Regional Dialects

17:45 - Kids’ Movies, Cars, And Music Tangents

28:00 - Red Dead, Open Worlds, And Game Design

40:50 - Pokemon Performance, Side Quests, And Nostalgia

48:15 - Sticky Vs Onion And Scent, Love, Biology

59:20 - Food, Labels, Nuggets, And What’s “Real”

01:07:40 - Death Dates, Scans, And Medical Anxiety

01:19:10 - Cannibalism Ethics, Prep Styles, And Dark Humor

01:28:55 - Ghosts, Screams, And When To Intervene

WEBVTT

00:00:45.399 --> 00:00:58.840
Uh so this is off the record slash off track slash on a hill slash slash backslash HTTP.

00:00:59.239 --> 00:01:01.000
Hashtag pound pound pound.

00:01:03.400 --> 00:01:08.280
Um so this is our first ever non-music related podcast.

00:01:08.519 --> 00:01:11.239
You're here in my house in the studio.

00:01:11.400 --> 00:01:19.959
We get to instead you know what's really funny is I make such a beautiful backdrop, and then we have to stare at this god-awful experience in front of me.

00:01:20.359 --> 00:01:21.959
That's my daughter.

00:01:22.840 --> 00:01:24.359
It's my daughter.

00:01:26.200 --> 00:01:28.120
She's handsome like her father.

00:01:29.159 --> 00:01:35.399
Dude, that is that is uh that's a lot of shelving and decorations.

00:01:36.839 --> 00:01:38.519
Did you guys decorate for Christmas?

00:01:38.679 --> 00:01:39.319
Yeah.

00:01:39.799 --> 00:01:41.239
It's not a lot of decorations.

00:01:41.399 --> 00:01:43.079
You're a very poor hoarder.

00:01:45.239 --> 00:01:47.239
What what all did you guys put up?

00:01:47.640 --> 00:01:49.159
Uh tree garland.

00:01:49.959 --> 00:01:51.000
You do outside stuff?

00:01:51.319 --> 00:01:52.039
Little person Santa.

00:01:52.199 --> 00:01:53.239
Yeah, we got some inflatables.

00:01:53.479 --> 00:01:54.359
Little person Santa.

00:01:54.599 --> 00:01:54.759
Yeah.

00:01:55.159 --> 00:01:56.039
So small Santa?

00:01:56.199 --> 00:01:57.959
That's like four foot.

00:01:58.839 --> 00:01:59.799
Like dwarf Santa.

00:02:00.039 --> 00:02:02.039
Yeah, some kind of Santa with dwarfism.

00:02:02.280 --> 00:02:05.560
Like um uh the fuck was Frodo?

00:02:06.280 --> 00:02:06.679
Hobbit.

00:02:06.839 --> 00:02:07.640
Hobbit Santa.

00:02:07.879 --> 00:02:08.199
Hobbit.

00:02:08.599 --> 00:02:09.319
Hobbit Santa.

00:02:09.640 --> 00:02:10.920
Does he have shoes?

00:02:12.199 --> 00:02:13.560
I wish he didn't now.

00:02:19.800 --> 00:02:26.039
Um Faith, Chris's daughter, is gonna be kind of running things for us today.

00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:28.599
No, never mind.

00:02:28.759 --> 00:02:29.800
We're on our own.

00:02:29.960 --> 00:02:32.120
Um abandoned as always.

00:02:32.360 --> 00:02:33.560
So I'm used to it.

00:02:33.640 --> 00:02:34.919
Thanks, Dad.

00:02:37.879 --> 00:02:39.960
So you you put up garland.

00:02:40.039 --> 00:02:41.000
What did you do outside?

00:02:41.240 --> 00:02:42.840
Inflatables, more garland.

00:02:43.240 --> 00:02:44.599
You didn't put any lights on?

00:02:44.840 --> 00:02:45.159
No.

00:02:45.560 --> 00:02:46.439
No lights outside.

00:02:46.680 --> 00:02:47.719
That's too much like work.

00:02:49.400 --> 00:02:55.159
If I let it look like the lights go up, it's like the Gretchen Wilson song where it's like, no, no, they're up year-round.

00:02:55.319 --> 00:02:55.799
Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:02:56.120 --> 00:02:57.159
If they go up, they don't come down.

00:02:57.400 --> 00:02:57.879
100%.

00:02:58.199 --> 00:02:58.840
Yes.

00:02:59.159 --> 00:03:04.599
I had to take down the Christmas lights on the old house to move to this one.

00:03:04.840 --> 00:03:07.960
They were currently up when I was moving.

00:03:08.359 --> 00:03:09.400
What month was that?

00:03:09.560 --> 00:03:11.400
That was that was October.

00:03:11.639 --> 00:03:13.560
So they were almost a whole year.

00:03:13.639 --> 00:03:13.960
Yeah.

00:03:14.199 --> 00:03:15.719
Damn near a whole year.

00:03:15.960 --> 00:03:17.319
That's funny, man.

00:03:17.879 --> 00:03:20.519
Um, so what what do you think of the place?

00:03:20.680 --> 00:03:21.079
I like it.

00:03:21.159 --> 00:03:21.319
Yeah.

00:03:21.560 --> 00:03:22.680
First time being at your house.

00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:23.400
I know.

00:03:23.560 --> 00:03:25.560
You're the first guest that we've had.

00:03:25.960 --> 00:03:29.479
No, you in in the house, legitimately, you're the first person to ever come over.

00:03:31.560 --> 00:03:32.199
Yeah.

00:03:32.599 --> 00:03:33.240
Yeah.

00:03:37.719 --> 00:03:39.560
I'm joking, it is beautiful.

00:03:39.799 --> 00:03:40.519
That's alright.

00:03:40.680 --> 00:03:42.359
It's got a lot of problems, but it's alright.

00:03:42.680 --> 00:03:45.960
You're you're like Harley's been telling me, like, oh man, it's so cluttered.

00:03:46.039 --> 00:03:47.319
We have to do this, we have to do that.

00:03:47.479 --> 00:03:56.039
It's like his house cluttered is still nicer than my like lived-in home with my five hellions and mother-in-law.

00:03:57.000 --> 00:04:01.560
It's still, yeah, it's like a Martha Stewart um magazine.

00:04:01.960 --> 00:04:04.439
I want to jump into a hypothetical with you.

00:04:05.479 --> 00:04:13.240
So I've had this argument with Taylor with my wife Lindsay, and now I want to see what you guys think.

00:04:13.400 --> 00:04:15.319
And with Taylor's boyfriend Dylan.

00:04:15.479 --> 00:04:17.639
Taylor's boyfriend Dylan was on my side on this.

00:04:17.800 --> 00:04:18.360
We'll see.

00:04:18.519 --> 00:04:20.040
This goes for you, Faith, too.

00:04:20.120 --> 00:04:21.079
You got to answer also.

00:04:21.240 --> 00:04:22.759
Oh, it's going to be controversial.

00:04:23.960 --> 00:04:36.280
Would you would you probably would you rather have to fight a chicken every time you get in or out of a car for a year?

00:04:36.519 --> 00:04:37.160
Yes.

00:04:37.720 --> 00:04:44.759
Or would you rather have to fight a lion once a year?

00:04:48.199 --> 00:04:52.279
I mean, if we're just going off just the information you put put out, a chicken every single time.

00:04:52.519 --> 00:04:53.240
Yes, right?

00:04:53.399 --> 00:04:54.360
That's the correct answer.

00:04:54.600 --> 00:04:54.759
Yeah.

00:04:54.920 --> 00:04:59.560
Like, does Lindsay own like padded armor and a firearm?

00:04:59.959 --> 00:05:01.079
My blood was boiling.

00:05:01.240 --> 00:05:03.240
But you can kill these things every time?

00:05:03.399 --> 00:05:06.759
You know, you don't have to kill, you just have to fight both of them.

00:05:07.000 --> 00:05:08.920
No killing even has to be involved.

00:05:09.000 --> 00:05:10.759
I mean, I recommend killing the chicken.

00:05:11.639 --> 00:05:14.279
The lion only has to have one, so it's no more of an issue.

00:05:14.519 --> 00:05:15.000
A year.

00:05:15.159 --> 00:05:15.560
I know.

00:05:15.719 --> 00:05:17.000
Yeah, but winning that.

00:05:17.319 --> 00:05:17.719
No moving.

00:05:19.000 --> 00:05:19.399
Exactly.

00:05:19.800 --> 00:05:20.120
Exactly.

00:05:20.360 --> 00:05:23.959
Like a line doesn't say like, oh, that zebra lost, I can leave him alone now.

00:05:24.040 --> 00:05:27.240
The line's like, his innards taste good.

00:05:27.560 --> 00:05:29.319
Like that's a fight with a lion.

00:05:29.399 --> 00:05:33.399
A chicken, it's like you bonk it on the head and you choke the chicken a little bit.

00:05:34.360 --> 00:05:41.480
Can you believe these bad shit, crazy lunatics, Taylor and Lindsay, tried to tell me they would fight a fucking lion?

00:05:42.040 --> 00:05:43.959
They would fist bite a lion.

00:05:44.439 --> 00:05:45.560
But this has been going on for years.

00:05:45.639 --> 00:05:55.319
I mean, look at the argument, or look at the the the question that was posed where would you rather be lost in the woods and come across a guy versus a bear?

00:05:55.480 --> 00:05:55.639
Yeah.

00:05:55.879 --> 00:05:57.000
The answer is a man.

00:05:57.240 --> 00:05:57.719
All day.

00:05:57.879 --> 00:05:58.839
All day, every day.

00:05:59.079 --> 00:05:59.399
All day.

00:05:59.560 --> 00:06:00.040
100%.

00:06:02.040 --> 00:06:03.079
I still choose the man.

00:06:03.399 --> 00:06:03.959
No, no, no.

00:06:04.120 --> 00:06:05.639
You would choose a bear over a man?

00:06:09.639 --> 00:06:10.519
No, it won't.

00:06:11.480 --> 00:06:13.639
Well, here, let's put this into that hypothetical.

00:06:13.800 --> 00:06:15.800
Let's say this bear is out for blood.

00:06:16.279 --> 00:06:20.439
It knows you it's coming, it but this bear is coming for you.

00:06:21.240 --> 00:06:24.120
I don't you pissed off his bear family.

00:06:24.439 --> 00:06:26.279
You murdered his bear children.

00:06:26.600 --> 00:06:27.879
You have a picnic basket.

00:06:30.600 --> 00:06:33.000
So you still go with the bear?

00:06:35.719 --> 00:06:36.839
Yeah, because it's a bear.

00:06:36.920 --> 00:06:37.560
They're really cute.

00:06:37.719 --> 00:06:43.480
I feel like I'm very charming, so I could charm a man into not killing me.

00:06:43.639 --> 00:06:46.360
If I met a man in the woods, you know what I mean?

00:06:48.199 --> 00:06:49.000
Yeah, I see it.

00:06:49.159 --> 00:06:49.319
Yeah.

00:06:49.480 --> 00:06:50.120
Yeah, I see it.

00:06:50.199 --> 00:06:50.839
Yeah.

00:06:51.240 --> 00:06:56.199
Me, on the other hand, I'm gonna have a GoPro and I'm gonna try to I'm gonna try to woo that bear.

00:06:56.279 --> 00:06:57.399
You can try to fuck that bear.

00:06:57.879 --> 00:06:59.000
I yeah, I'm gonna try.

00:06:59.240 --> 00:07:00.120
I'm gonna try.

00:07:00.759 --> 00:07:01.719
Like super troopers.

00:07:04.519 --> 00:07:06.759
YouTube thing or is it a corner thing?

00:07:07.000 --> 00:07:09.480
I don't care what you guys do with it once I'm dead.

00:07:09.800 --> 00:07:11.480
Like, make that money.

00:07:11.800 --> 00:07:13.639
I feel it's like a YouTube thing.

00:07:13.959 --> 00:07:15.639
National Geographic for sure.

00:07:15.800 --> 00:07:16.360
Yeah.

00:07:16.600 --> 00:07:17.240
Yeah.

00:07:19.159 --> 00:07:20.759
It was scientific, alright.

00:07:20.920 --> 00:07:25.240
And story and for some reason, homophobic.

00:07:27.240 --> 00:07:29.399
I didn't mean for those slurs to come out.

00:07:29.480 --> 00:07:29.719
Okay.

00:07:29.959 --> 00:07:33.159
Can't believe you started this episode with saying stuff about Israel, man.

00:07:33.240 --> 00:07:36.040
That's gonna be brutal to have to edit.

00:07:36.439 --> 00:07:38.439
That's why I said it so you edit it out.

00:07:40.439 --> 00:07:43.240
Harley never Harley never edits anything.

00:07:43.399 --> 00:07:44.600
He's like, I'll edit that out.

00:07:44.920 --> 00:07:45.319
He doesn't.

00:07:45.480 --> 00:07:50.680
Chris just starts every episode with the worst word, the one that we do not speak of.

00:07:50.920 --> 00:07:51.800
Nuclear.

00:07:52.279 --> 00:07:54.199
Can you say nuclear nuclear?

00:07:54.439 --> 00:07:55.159
It's nuclear.

00:07:55.319 --> 00:07:56.600
Nucle nuclear?

00:07:57.079 --> 00:07:57.800
Nuclear.

00:07:58.120 --> 00:07:59.000
Nuclear.

00:08:00.759 --> 00:08:05.399
You're breaking it, you're you're you're breaking it down like therapist.

00:08:05.719 --> 00:08:07.800
Therapist or the rapist.

00:08:09.000 --> 00:08:10.360
Nuclear.

00:08:11.399 --> 00:08:12.279
Nuclear.

00:08:12.519 --> 00:08:13.159
Nuclear.

00:08:13.719 --> 00:08:17.639
Now I'm only saying nuclear now because that is how you properly pronounce it.

00:08:17.879 --> 00:08:20.120
If we were talking regular, I'd say nuclear.

00:08:20.360 --> 00:08:21.000
Nuclear?

00:08:21.159 --> 00:08:22.040
Nuclear, bruh.

00:08:22.279 --> 00:08:23.879
Dude, totally nuclear, dude.

00:08:24.120 --> 00:08:31.719
Um have you ever uh have you ever discussed bathroom habits in your family?

00:08:32.920 --> 00:08:33.240
No.

00:08:34.279 --> 00:08:34.920
Why?

00:08:35.320 --> 00:08:37.159
Like the wiping situation?

00:08:37.480 --> 00:08:40.120
Yeah, that's a that was a dinner topic last time, you know.

00:08:41.080 --> 00:08:42.519
Oh, can you pass the green beans?

00:08:42.600 --> 00:08:44.840
Don't forget, girls, wipe front to back.

00:08:45.080 --> 00:08:54.040
Well, no, it's it's more about like it's more about like so so you know how like you wipe your butt, right?

00:08:55.800 --> 00:08:57.720
How far how far in?

00:08:59.799 --> 00:09:00.919
You know what I'm saying?

00:09:01.559 --> 00:09:02.840
None zero percent.

00:09:03.320 --> 00:09:03.960
Zilge nada?

00:09:04.439 --> 00:09:04.840
No in?

00:09:05.080 --> 00:09:05.320
No in.

00:09:05.399 --> 00:09:07.320
I don't know rubber gloves.

00:09:09.639 --> 00:09:11.559
And I don't wash my hands.

00:09:12.519 --> 00:09:13.799
I can tell.

00:09:15.799 --> 00:09:16.279
Sorry.

00:09:17.000 --> 00:09:19.159
I think I go at least one knuckle.

00:09:22.919 --> 00:09:23.799
You know what I mean?

00:09:23.879 --> 00:09:24.840
Like, you know.

00:09:26.919 --> 00:09:27.480
I don't.

00:09:27.639 --> 00:09:28.120
I don't know.

00:09:28.600 --> 00:09:29.399
Just the rim?

00:09:29.879 --> 00:09:35.480
Yeah, just how how deep is your ass?

00:09:36.120 --> 00:09:37.159
Not very deep, I guess.

00:09:37.240 --> 00:09:37.480
I don't know.

00:09:37.559 --> 00:09:38.360
You have to ask my wife.

00:09:38.519 --> 00:09:39.879
My fingers have been up there.

00:09:40.120 --> 00:09:44.679
Like I feel like when I'm wiping, you gotta go like that's that's the cheek there.

00:09:45.159 --> 00:09:45.879
Like a hand.

00:09:46.759 --> 00:09:47.000
Yeah.

00:09:47.240 --> 00:09:50.759
We're talking about wiping now, you gotta listen, you gotta like spread it, right?

00:09:51.159 --> 00:09:55.399
And then you hand and then you and then you hand it.

00:09:57.480 --> 00:10:00.120
Well, like definitely a knuckle, at least.

00:10:02.439 --> 00:10:02.759
No.

00:10:03.080 --> 00:10:05.480
Like this do you consider this a knuckle?

00:10:05.879 --> 00:10:06.519
Is that a knuckle?

00:10:06.759 --> 00:10:08.279
I guess it is a finger knuckle.

00:10:08.519 --> 00:10:11.559
Because like that's a knuckle, and that's a knuckle.

00:10:11.879 --> 00:10:13.399
But is that little nub a knuckle?

00:10:13.559 --> 00:10:17.080
Oh, so when someone says like it's a one knuckler or two knuckler, oh that's what they mean.

00:10:17.399 --> 00:10:18.120
Two knuckler, yeah.

00:10:18.200 --> 00:10:19.879
One knuckler, two knuckler, three knuckler.

00:10:20.519 --> 00:10:21.639
With knuckle.

00:10:21.879 --> 00:10:22.200
No.

00:10:22.439 --> 00:10:23.399
I've been saying that wrong.

00:10:23.559 --> 00:10:25.159
Did you know that's an inch?

00:10:25.399 --> 00:10:26.200
That is not an inch.

00:10:26.360 --> 00:10:27.399
To the per to the first knuckle?

00:10:27.639 --> 00:10:28.200
That's not an inch.

00:10:28.279 --> 00:10:28.840
It's supposed to be.

00:10:29.080 --> 00:10:30.360
My inch is bigger than your inch.

00:10:30.919 --> 00:10:31.559
Probably.

00:10:37.720 --> 00:10:38.439
I'm three.

00:10:39.720 --> 00:10:42.600
Um yeah, I was curious.

00:10:43.159 --> 00:10:44.039
What else what else?

00:10:44.120 --> 00:10:45.000
What do you got?

00:10:47.799 --> 00:10:48.439
I got nothing.

00:10:48.919 --> 00:10:50.840
You got any would you rather questions?

00:10:59.960 --> 00:11:00.439
Yeah.

00:11:01.080 --> 00:11:01.960
Go for it.

00:11:03.080 --> 00:11:04.679
Appalachia or Appalachia?

00:11:04.840 --> 00:11:05.720
Appalachia.

00:11:14.039 --> 00:11:15.639
Appalachian Mountains?

00:11:17.799 --> 00:11:19.080
You don't say Appalachian.

00:11:19.639 --> 00:11:23.000
I don't know, but if you live there, you say it totally different than people that don't live there.

00:11:24.039 --> 00:11:24.919
Where do you live there?

00:11:26.200 --> 00:11:27.720
Are we in the Appalachia?

00:11:28.039 --> 00:11:29.080
No, no, we're not.

00:11:31.080 --> 00:11:32.200
What does that mean?

00:11:32.759 --> 00:11:35.159
To be more specific, we're in the Piedmont region.

00:11:36.759 --> 00:11:38.919
That may be true, I don't remember.

00:11:41.320 --> 00:11:42.439
Appalachia.

00:11:42.519 --> 00:11:44.200
That just feels weird, weird.

00:11:44.439 --> 00:11:45.000
Wrong.

00:11:45.240 --> 00:11:46.439
Feels wrong.

00:11:46.759 --> 00:11:47.480
Appalachian.

00:11:47.799 --> 00:11:50.279
I don't like kissing your cousin in Appalachia.

00:11:50.600 --> 00:11:52.120
West Virginia for sure.

00:11:52.360 --> 00:11:55.159
I almost dated a cousin on accident once.

00:11:55.960 --> 00:11:57.320
True story.

00:11:57.720 --> 00:12:00.600
So I was so I was a family reunion.

00:12:01.240 --> 00:12:16.679
No, so I was I was in high school or right out of high school and moved in with my mom's dad, who uh I hadn't seen for like years, like very, very long time.

00:12:17.240 --> 00:12:29.000
And I'm sitting in his dining room, and I look on the wall, and there's like all these family pictures, and I recognized a girl, and I was like, who's that?

00:12:29.960 --> 00:12:35.320
And my my mom goes, Oh, that's your cousin so-and-so, Bobby.

00:12:36.279 --> 00:13:18.050
And uh it we didn't do anything, nothing happened, but like we definitely met up for like drinks at like a place, and turned out that we were in fact cousins.

00:13:18.290 --> 00:13:20.610
And no matter what she says, nothing happened.

00:13:21.650 --> 00:13:27.730
Well, no, nothing, nothing happened because it was very soon after that we started talking to that side of the family again.

00:13:27.970 --> 00:13:33.889
We definitely saw each other, and I was like, There is no list.

00:13:34.850 --> 00:13:39.170
She did end up beat uh dating uh a friend of mine for a while, a couple years.

00:13:39.570 --> 00:13:40.850
That was weird.

00:13:41.570 --> 00:13:42.370
Weird as that is.

00:13:42.450 --> 00:13:44.770
There's so many stories out there where it's like, yeah, I almost dated my cousin.

00:13:44.850 --> 00:13:45.889
It's a very similar storyline.

00:13:46.050 --> 00:13:48.530
It's like I didn't even know until like Yeah, oh yeah.

00:13:49.730 --> 00:13:50.450
Oh, dude.

00:13:50.690 --> 00:13:53.650
My great-grandmother tried to get me to date my cousin.

00:13:53.889 --> 00:13:54.450
Really?

00:13:54.690 --> 00:13:55.410
On purpose.

00:13:55.650 --> 00:13:56.530
No, she didn't.

00:13:56.690 --> 00:13:58.210
No, no, granny.

00:13:58.450 --> 00:14:02.050
Granny was physically ill, mentally sharp as a tack.

00:14:02.210 --> 00:14:03.889
And still wanted you to date your cousin.

00:14:03.970 --> 00:14:04.129
Yes.

00:14:04.290 --> 00:14:04.770
On purpose.

00:14:04.930 --> 00:14:06.770
So at the time, at the time we were both single.

00:14:06.850 --> 00:14:08.930
And she's like, you guys are just so sweet.

00:14:09.250 --> 00:14:09.650
You're nice.

00:14:10.210 --> 00:14:10.530
She's nice.

00:14:10.930 --> 00:14:12.050
First, second, third?

00:14:12.210 --> 00:14:12.770
I don't know.

00:14:12.850 --> 00:14:13.570
The first.

00:14:14.129 --> 00:14:16.850
I know was it your uncle's daughter?

00:14:17.170 --> 00:14:20.690
It's my you know third third third cousin?

00:14:20.770 --> 00:14:21.090
I don't know.

00:14:21.250 --> 00:14:21.490
I don't know.

00:14:21.889 --> 00:14:23.730
I think that's legal in most places.

00:14:26.850 --> 00:14:29.090
Um far enough, right?

00:14:29.170 --> 00:14:29.410
Yeah.

00:14:30.129 --> 00:14:34.129
I really wish I didn't bring my daughter right now because I would have totally been making some awesome jokes.

00:14:34.370 --> 00:14:36.610
The point is, I think it's Appalachia.

00:14:40.290 --> 00:14:42.450
What about speaking of pronunciation?

00:14:42.530 --> 00:14:44.290
What about Creek versus Crick?

00:14:44.530 --> 00:14:45.810
It's Creek all day.

00:14:46.050 --> 00:14:46.530
Creek?

00:14:46.850 --> 00:14:47.330
Creek.

00:14:47.490 --> 00:14:48.690
You go play in the creek?

00:14:48.770 --> 00:14:49.009
Yeah.

00:14:49.170 --> 00:14:50.450
You don't go down to the crick.

00:14:50.690 --> 00:14:51.009
No.

00:14:51.410 --> 00:14:52.690
Creek versus crick?

00:14:53.170 --> 00:14:54.370
I've never even heard crick before.

00:14:54.530 --> 00:14:55.410
You've never heard crick?

00:14:55.730 --> 00:14:57.889
Oh, I'm I'm a Ohio Yankee, dude.

00:14:57.970 --> 00:14:59.170
We got a whole different language.

00:14:59.330 --> 00:15:00.690
It's because you're Yankees.

00:15:02.290 --> 00:15:05.570
It's like essentially like different dialects in America, it gets so varied.

00:15:05.730 --> 00:15:07.170
And they are essentially a different language.

00:15:07.410 --> 00:15:07.570
Yeah.

00:15:07.970 --> 00:15:13.170
Well, living in West Virginia for a while and having half my family from West Virginia, I've never heard Crick.

00:15:13.250 --> 00:15:14.210
You've never heard Crick?

00:15:14.370 --> 00:15:14.530
No.

00:15:14.610 --> 00:15:15.250
The weird thing.

00:15:15.330 --> 00:15:17.330
Oh my god, are you one of those pop weirdos?

00:15:17.970 --> 00:15:18.930
Pop to soda.

00:15:19.009 --> 00:15:19.570
It's soda.

00:15:19.730 --> 00:15:20.129
It's pop.

00:15:20.530 --> 00:15:20.930
It is pop.

00:15:22.210 --> 00:15:24.050
Listen, it was soda pop, right?

00:15:24.210 --> 00:15:24.450
Okay.

00:15:24.610 --> 00:15:25.250
So I'm not sure.

00:15:25.410 --> 00:15:26.770
That was before the Civil War.

00:15:27.490 --> 00:15:28.370
And then we won.

00:15:28.610 --> 00:15:30.050
I'm not calling you Cornel.

00:15:30.290 --> 00:15:30.530
Okay.

00:15:30.610 --> 00:15:31.730
I'm not calling you Cornell.

00:15:31.810 --> 00:15:32.290
Hey, Cornell.

00:15:32.370 --> 00:15:33.250
Hey, Cornell, Cornel.

00:15:33.410 --> 00:15:34.930
No, not you, Cornell, the other Cornell.

00:15:35.090 --> 00:15:36.610
Like it's on what part of the world you're in, bro.

00:15:37.090 --> 00:15:37.570
That's true.

00:15:37.650 --> 00:15:38.450
That's true.

00:15:38.690 --> 00:15:39.330
That's true.

00:15:39.490 --> 00:15:41.490
Um, no, it's pop, dude.

00:15:41.650 --> 00:15:43.889
It's you go down the store, you grab pop pop.

00:15:44.370 --> 00:15:46.930
You say pop around here, you're gonna get jacked up.

00:15:47.090 --> 00:15:48.370
I just say coke.

00:15:48.530 --> 00:15:49.970
I just say coke or Pepsi.

00:15:50.129 --> 00:15:50.850
Can I get some Coke?

00:15:50.930 --> 00:15:52.290
Whatever they give me to give me.

00:15:53.009 --> 00:15:53.889
I'm gonna afford it.

00:15:54.129 --> 00:15:56.129
Either way, it's a have have a fun day.

00:15:56.610 --> 00:15:58.370
I got that morning both.

00:15:58.610 --> 00:16:00.770
Um no crick, dude.

00:16:00.850 --> 00:16:02.129
You play in a crick.

00:16:02.210 --> 00:16:03.410
You have a crick in your backyard.

00:16:03.650 --> 00:16:06.770
I have a crick in my neck, but you go down to the creek.

00:16:07.170 --> 00:16:08.770
We use both where I'm from.

00:16:08.930 --> 00:16:10.370
Like it's beaver creek.

00:16:10.450 --> 00:16:12.690
The area that I grew up in was Beaver Creek.

00:16:12.930 --> 00:16:14.129
Wait, Beaver Creek?

00:16:14.290 --> 00:16:19.330
There's also a beaver creek in West Virginia, not far from from where I lived.

00:16:20.210 --> 00:16:21.730
Yo, weavers.

00:16:21.970 --> 00:16:23.410
We might have grown up close to each other.

00:16:23.810 --> 00:16:24.129
All related.

00:16:24.210 --> 00:16:25.490
No, I didn't grow up there.

00:16:25.810 --> 00:16:27.650
Beaver Creek runs through West Virginia.

00:16:27.810 --> 00:16:28.690
The one that I'm talking about.

00:16:29.009 --> 00:16:30.690
Yeah, I lived there as an adult.

00:16:30.930 --> 00:16:31.250
Ah.

00:16:31.810 --> 00:16:33.570
So did I, technically.

00:16:33.889 --> 00:16:35.250
How old were you?

00:16:35.730 --> 00:16:36.450
19.

00:16:37.009 --> 00:16:38.050
Yeah, yeah.

00:16:38.290 --> 00:16:41.330
We would have, yeah, we maybe really close.

00:16:41.570 --> 00:16:42.450
Maybe.

00:16:42.930 --> 00:16:45.650
But it's Creek when talking about Beaver Creek.

00:16:45.730 --> 00:16:47.889
Have you ever had your catalytic converter stolen?

00:16:48.129 --> 00:16:48.610
Yeah.

00:16:49.009 --> 00:16:49.970
That was probably me.

00:16:51.730 --> 00:16:53.170
But that was around here.

00:16:53.730 --> 00:16:54.530
It's still you.

00:16:57.650 --> 00:17:01.090
Crick sound like a word you should not have the same with crick?

00:17:01.330 --> 00:17:01.730
Crick?

00:17:01.970 --> 00:17:02.930
It kind of sounds like a slur.

00:17:03.170 --> 00:17:04.049
It does sound like a slur.

00:17:04.289 --> 00:17:05.009
Kind of look like a crick.

00:17:05.250 --> 00:17:06.289
Stop acting like one.

00:17:08.450 --> 00:17:10.129
That's what we call people from West Virginia.

00:17:10.369 --> 00:17:11.009
Fucking crick.

00:17:11.170 --> 00:17:12.210
Fucking dirty cricks.

00:17:12.369 --> 00:17:13.410
Go back where you came from.

00:17:13.730 --> 00:17:14.049
I like it.

00:17:14.129 --> 00:17:15.089
We shouldn't use that.

00:17:15.329 --> 00:17:16.289
We should use it.

00:17:17.329 --> 00:17:19.089
It just describes hillbillies.

00:17:19.170 --> 00:17:20.529
Next time we're on with Taylor.

00:17:20.849 --> 00:17:21.889
What about this?

00:17:22.289 --> 00:17:23.490
This is a troublesome one.

00:17:23.650 --> 00:17:25.009
Because this is wrong all the way around.

00:17:25.329 --> 00:17:26.289
You can't say that word.

00:17:29.650 --> 00:17:30.049
Hello.

00:17:31.009 --> 00:17:31.570
Pillow.

00:17:32.050 --> 00:17:32.850
Hillo.

00:17:33.410 --> 00:17:33.890
Pillow.

00:17:34.450 --> 00:17:35.250
Hillow.

00:17:36.290 --> 00:17:38.770
I say I say it with an E.

00:17:39.090 --> 00:17:39.570
Pillow.

00:17:39.730 --> 00:17:41.570
P-E-L-L-O-W.

00:17:41.890 --> 00:17:42.130
Hello.

00:17:42.530 --> 00:17:44.370
Kevin from Gatlinberg's wife, right?

00:17:44.450 --> 00:17:45.170
My aunt.

00:17:47.170 --> 00:17:47.650
Mouden?

00:17:48.130 --> 00:17:48.610
Mountain?

00:17:48.850 --> 00:17:49.810
Mountain Dew?

00:17:49.970 --> 00:17:50.850
It's Mountain Dew.

00:17:51.090 --> 00:17:51.410
Mounted?

00:17:51.570 --> 00:17:51.810
Mountain.

00:17:52.130 --> 00:17:52.690
Mounted Dew.

00:17:52.930 --> 00:17:53.730
Mounted Dew.

00:17:54.050 --> 00:17:54.370
Yes.

00:17:54.930 --> 00:17:55.970
Is she Swedish?

00:17:56.210 --> 00:17:57.490
Shout out to you, Maggie.

00:17:57.810 --> 00:17:58.530
Mounted?

00:17:59.010 --> 00:17:59.730
Mountain.

00:17:59.890 --> 00:18:01.250
That is wrong in all languages.

00:18:01.490 --> 00:18:02.530
Mountain Dew.

00:18:02.850 --> 00:18:03.410
Mountain.

00:18:04.610 --> 00:18:05.810
Boingy Boingy.

00:18:07.330 --> 00:18:08.530
Crown or Crayon?

00:18:09.090 --> 00:18:09.730
Crayon.

00:18:10.210 --> 00:18:10.850
Crayon.

00:18:11.090 --> 00:18:11.490
The crowns.

00:18:11.570 --> 00:18:12.370
Get the crowns.

00:18:12.690 --> 00:18:13.250
Crayon.

00:18:13.490 --> 00:18:17.490
If I'm talking to someone who's not also retarded, I say crayon.

00:18:17.890 --> 00:18:22.050
But if I'm talking, if I'm talking to any one of my children, it's crown.

00:18:22.530 --> 00:18:23.410
Crayon.

00:18:27.410 --> 00:18:28.450
Can't pronounce lighters.

00:18:29.090 --> 00:18:31.330
And I never made it past fifth grade people.

00:18:32.610 --> 00:18:34.770
That was in Virginia, not West Virginia.

00:18:36.450 --> 00:18:37.170
Make it to the show.

00:18:39.970 --> 00:18:42.130
Pin versus pen versus pen.

00:18:42.690 --> 00:18:45.250
This is an argument that happens a lot in my house.

00:18:45.810 --> 00:18:47.010
You write with a pen.

00:18:48.050 --> 00:18:49.490
You poke somebody with a pin.

00:18:51.970 --> 00:18:52.690
Pin and pen.

00:18:53.170 --> 00:18:53.570
Yeah.

00:18:53.810 --> 00:18:55.010
And then what's the other one?

00:18:55.090 --> 00:18:56.450
There's like there's pen, pen.

00:18:56.850 --> 00:18:57.810
It's all pronounced the same.

00:18:57.970 --> 00:18:58.530
Yeah.

00:18:58.770 --> 00:18:59.890
How's there an argument?

00:19:00.050 --> 00:19:07.650
Well, because it's supposed to be pen, hen, and then pin, pin the tail on the donkey.

00:19:07.890 --> 00:19:11.250
But E N and IN make the same i and eh.

00:19:12.210 --> 00:19:14.930
I'm not you know, I'm not an English major.

00:19:15.170 --> 00:19:15.650
I don't care.

00:19:15.810 --> 00:19:18.050
Well, you know, like the apples and banana song.

00:19:18.130 --> 00:19:18.930
You remember that song, right?

00:19:19.170 --> 00:19:19.890
Apples and bananas.

00:19:20.370 --> 00:19:20.530
Yeah.

00:19:22.210 --> 00:19:23.410
Shoot me, please.

00:19:23.570 --> 00:19:25.810
Oh, dude, if I have to hear that song.

00:19:25.970 --> 00:19:30.930
Or have you guys been watching the the Mickey Mouse Christmas movie?

00:19:31.330 --> 00:19:32.050
Wait, which one?

00:19:32.210 --> 00:19:33.410
Um The Harmonica?

00:19:33.570 --> 00:19:34.210
No, the one.

00:19:34.290 --> 00:19:35.490
Oh no, not Mickey Mouse.

00:19:35.570 --> 00:19:36.210
Uh Elmo.

00:19:36.290 --> 00:19:37.330
The Elmo Christmas movie.

00:19:37.650 --> 00:19:38.290
No, I didn't know that.

00:19:38.450 --> 00:19:41.090
Oh, dude, Tango learns how to talk, it's a whole thing.

00:19:41.170 --> 00:19:42.050
I've seen it five times.

00:19:42.450 --> 00:19:43.250
Fuck is Tango?

00:19:43.330 --> 00:19:43.970
He's a dog.

00:19:44.210 --> 00:19:44.850
He, she.

00:19:45.010 --> 00:19:45.650
I don't know.

00:19:46.210 --> 00:19:47.010
It's a dog.

00:19:47.170 --> 00:19:48.610
That's offensive, Harley.

00:19:51.170 --> 00:19:52.610
Dogs are people too.

00:19:52.930 --> 00:19:53.170
It.

00:19:53.810 --> 00:19:56.370
Um, no, that movie sucks.

00:19:56.690 --> 00:19:57.970
Sucks so bad.

00:19:58.130 --> 00:20:01.730
I've had to watch it five times being a parent.

00:20:03.170 --> 00:20:03.650
Yeah.

00:20:03.890 --> 00:20:04.530
Yeah.

00:20:04.930 --> 00:20:05.810
I didn't have to.

00:20:05.890 --> 00:20:07.650
I have to watch Wallen Cars.

00:20:08.210 --> 00:20:09.090
You like cars?

00:20:09.250 --> 00:20:09.890
I love cars.

00:20:10.050 --> 00:20:10.370
Really?

00:20:10.530 --> 00:20:11.810
The first one and the third one.

00:20:12.050 --> 00:20:12.850
The third one?

00:20:13.010 --> 00:20:13.410
Yeah, dude.

00:20:13.730 --> 00:20:15.650
We got the game or surrounded like the third one.

00:20:15.730 --> 00:20:15.810
Yeah.

00:20:16.050 --> 00:20:16.690
It's fucking sick.

00:20:16.850 --> 00:20:17.490
The racing game?

00:20:17.570 --> 00:20:17.810
Yeah.

00:20:17.890 --> 00:20:22.530
So my son had it on his Switch before he decided to break it.

00:20:23.570 --> 00:20:27.410
And then I got it for the Xbox too.

00:20:28.210 --> 00:20:29.810
I got it for the Xbox as well.

00:20:29.970 --> 00:20:30.770
Oh yeah, dude.

00:20:30.850 --> 00:20:33.890
Every time I go and play like Seven Days to Die, he sees cars right next to it.

00:20:34.130 --> 00:20:34.530
Oh yeah, yeah.

00:20:37.330 --> 00:20:39.410
And it shows his ass when I don't play it.

00:20:39.490 --> 00:20:40.530
It's fun as fuck, though.

00:20:40.770 --> 00:20:43.170
Who is your favorite cars character?

00:20:43.410 --> 00:20:44.050
In what?

00:20:44.290 --> 00:20:45.170
The universe?

00:20:45.490 --> 00:20:46.130
Yeah.

00:20:48.450 --> 00:20:50.770
Uh dude, how am I having a brain fart?

00:20:51.090 --> 00:20:51.490
Oh my god.

00:20:51.650 --> 00:20:52.210
Not Tomator.

00:20:52.690 --> 00:20:53.170
No, no, no.

00:20:53.330 --> 00:20:54.050
No, no, no, no.

00:20:54.370 --> 00:20:55.490
Oh, god damn it.

00:20:56.210 --> 00:20:56.770
Pit stop.

00:20:58.770 --> 00:20:59.970
Oh dude.

00:21:00.770 --> 00:21:01.890
Mario and Luigi?

00:21:02.130 --> 00:21:04.370
Is that what it's not Speedo?

00:21:07.490 --> 00:21:07.890
Guido.

00:21:08.130 --> 00:21:08.610
Guido.

00:21:08.770 --> 00:21:09.170
Guido.

00:21:09.330 --> 00:21:09.730
Pit stop.

00:21:11.730 --> 00:21:12.450
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:21:12.610 --> 00:21:13.170
Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:21:13.570 --> 00:21:16.370
I've only seen I've seen the first one and the second one.

00:21:16.450 --> 00:21:17.330
I did not see the third one.

00:21:17.970 --> 00:21:18.530
The second one sucks.

00:21:18.690 --> 00:21:19.170
Third one's good.

00:21:19.330 --> 00:21:19.490
Yeah.

00:21:19.570 --> 00:21:19.730
Yeah.

00:21:19.890 --> 00:21:20.610
The first one's good.

00:21:20.690 --> 00:21:22.210
There's too many Europeans in the second one.

00:21:22.370 --> 00:21:24.210
Do they just play Life is a Highway in all of them?

00:21:24.290 --> 00:21:24.450
No.

00:21:24.850 --> 00:21:25.570
Just the first one?

00:21:25.730 --> 00:21:26.130
Yeah.

00:21:27.330 --> 00:21:28.930
It feels like it should have carried over.

00:21:29.170 --> 00:21:29.730
It should have.

00:21:30.210 --> 00:21:33.650
If you're not gonna have it as like the the like you know the song in the beginning, just throw it in there somewhere.

00:21:33.810 --> 00:21:35.730
She could also like change the artist, too.

00:21:35.810 --> 00:21:37.170
You had Rascal Flats do it.

00:21:37.250 --> 00:21:39.730
Maybe you get like, I don't know, Sabrina Carpenter or something.

00:21:40.130 --> 00:21:42.290
But you shut your whore mouth, Rascal Flats, baby.

00:21:42.530 --> 00:21:43.410
Rascal Flats?

00:21:44.530 --> 00:21:49.090
How about let's talk about fatties in the music industry real quick?

00:21:49.570 --> 00:21:51.730
Have you ever seen Blues Traveler?

00:21:51.890 --> 00:21:53.730
The guy No, you've told me about it, but no.

00:21:53.890 --> 00:21:56.370
Dude, uh, what the hell is his name?

00:21:56.610 --> 00:21:57.490
John Popper.

00:21:58.050 --> 00:22:02.690
Guy has to be like 450 pounds at least.

00:22:03.410 --> 00:22:10.450
But like the voice of an angel and plays the harmonica, like that's like that British chick that was on TV.

00:22:10.610 --> 00:22:12.530
I mean, like American Idol.

00:22:12.690 --> 00:22:13.170
Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:22:13.250 --> 00:22:13.410
Yeah.

00:22:13.730 --> 00:22:14.210
What's her name?

00:22:14.370 --> 00:22:16.210
I don't remember, but she lost a bunch of weight now.

00:22:16.370 --> 00:22:16.690
Did she?

00:22:16.850 --> 00:22:17.890
Oh, yeah, dude.

00:22:18.210 --> 00:22:19.010
No, no, no, no.

00:22:19.330 --> 00:22:20.130
Not my name.

00:22:20.530 --> 00:22:25.650
No, this is an actual, like, just a regular person that signed up to do like American Idol.

00:22:25.810 --> 00:22:27.410
And she has like the most beautiful voice ever.

00:22:27.650 --> 00:22:28.450
Like, I tear up to the show.

00:22:28.610 --> 00:22:30.130
And she was like big old lady.

00:22:30.290 --> 00:22:32.050
And then she lost all of that weight.

00:22:32.210 --> 00:22:34.370
Oh my god, what's her fucking name?

00:22:35.010 --> 00:22:35.890
I can't remember.

00:22:36.050 --> 00:22:37.010
There's no live chat function.

00:22:37.090 --> 00:22:38.450
She got chat if you're listening.

00:22:39.090 --> 00:22:39.650
Chat.

00:22:39.890 --> 00:22:40.370
Chat.

00:22:40.770 --> 00:22:43.490
Um, she she uh she was older too, right?

00:22:43.570 --> 00:22:46.770
She was like in her like 40s or 50s, dude.

00:22:47.010 --> 00:22:48.370
Any other day I know her name.

00:22:48.530 --> 00:22:49.330
It's like Guido.

00:22:49.490 --> 00:22:51.810
Like I she had fucked up teeth too, remember?

00:22:51.890 --> 00:22:53.970
She got she got freaked up teeth.

00:22:54.210 --> 00:22:57.410
Um I don't care.

00:22:57.970 --> 00:22:58.930
That's the point.

00:22:59.570 --> 00:23:01.650
Somebody would have to monitor the chat.

00:23:02.050 --> 00:23:10.050
The training, like we need a PR person on screen at all times.

00:23:13.090 --> 00:23:14.530
Not Amy Winehouse.

00:23:14.770 --> 00:23:15.410
No, not Amy.

00:23:15.730 --> 00:23:16.290
Not Adele.

00:23:16.690 --> 00:23:16.930
No.

00:23:17.330 --> 00:23:19.330
Did you just type in fat girls in music?

00:23:19.570 --> 00:23:21.170
Because that's crazy.

00:23:21.490 --> 00:23:25.890
No, I typed in British female singers and guest 2000s.

00:23:26.210 --> 00:23:26.850
That's not it.

00:23:27.410 --> 00:23:29.730
No, no, you got you're you're Googling it all wrong.

00:23:29.890 --> 00:23:31.490
You gotta keyword searches.

00:23:31.890 --> 00:23:32.370
Yeah.

00:23:32.690 --> 00:23:33.890
Singer American Idol.

00:23:34.290 --> 00:23:35.010
Voice You Kish.

00:23:37.090 --> 00:23:37.970
Was it the voice?

00:23:38.130 --> 00:23:39.090
I didn't think it was the voice.

00:23:39.250 --> 00:23:40.530
It was one of those shows.

00:23:40.770 --> 00:23:50.690
Um, and then also another uh another fatty in music is the guy from Rascal Flats with the the voice of an angel.

00:23:50.770 --> 00:23:54.050
He was able to overcome his obesity to be a star.

00:23:54.290 --> 00:24:01.170
I always thought he kind of reminded me of um Flavortown.

00:24:01.730 --> 00:24:02.450
Flavortown?

00:24:02.690 --> 00:24:03.730
Oh, Guy Fieri?

00:24:03.970 --> 00:24:05.010
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:24:05.170 --> 00:24:05.490
For sure.

00:24:05.730 --> 00:24:07.090
Every time I seen him, I was like, oh yeah.

00:24:07.570 --> 00:24:08.290
100%.

00:24:09.010 --> 00:24:10.370
The frosted tips.

00:24:11.170 --> 00:24:13.330
You guys been watching any Christmas movies?

00:24:13.970 --> 00:24:14.210
No.

00:24:15.410 --> 00:24:16.530
No, not really.

00:24:17.490 --> 00:24:19.490
Do you have a favorite Christmas movie?

00:24:20.850 --> 00:24:23.570
Ooh, that sounds super familiar.

00:24:24.530 --> 00:24:26.530
Is she a is she a big old lady?

00:24:28.770 --> 00:24:30.850
Yeah, that sounds like her.

00:24:33.650 --> 00:24:38.050
Anyways, I I hope that I can overcome my obesity in BSR someday.

00:24:39.090 --> 00:24:40.050
Susan Boyle.

00:24:40.370 --> 00:24:41.010
That's it.

00:24:41.330 --> 00:24:41.650
That's it.

00:24:41.970 --> 00:24:43.010
She's Scottish.

00:24:43.730 --> 00:24:45.650
She was on Britain's Got Talent in 2009.

00:24:45.890 --> 00:24:46.450
That is her.

00:24:46.770 --> 00:24:47.170
Dude.

00:24:47.330 --> 00:24:47.970
Oh my god.

00:24:50.130 --> 00:24:50.610
Her music.

00:24:52.370 --> 00:25:00.930
I would say the Santa Claus is coming to town movie, The Claymation, definitely the best Christmas movie.

00:25:01.410 --> 00:25:04.850
My favorite's the one with the um Heat Miser?

00:25:05.010 --> 00:25:05.330
Yes.

00:25:05.410 --> 00:25:05.650
Yes.

00:25:05.890 --> 00:25:08.370
Isn't that walking out the door?

00:25:09.170 --> 00:25:09.490
Yeah, yeah.

00:25:09.570 --> 00:25:09.890
That's it.

00:25:09.970 --> 00:25:10.450
Yeah, yeah.

00:25:10.770 --> 00:25:12.050
Santa Claus Coming to Town.

00:25:12.450 --> 00:25:14.850
Wait, no, that's not the Heat Miser one, is it?

00:25:15.330 --> 00:25:16.210
That's the one.

00:25:17.010 --> 00:25:17.570
Fuck me.

00:25:17.730 --> 00:25:23.810
Heat Miser and The Year Without a Santa, I think is what you're thinking of.

00:25:24.130 --> 00:25:25.330
Jack Frost?

00:25:25.650 --> 00:25:26.690
Jack Frost is good.

00:25:28.050 --> 00:25:30.690
Wait, because isn't Frosty sucks.

00:25:31.010 --> 00:25:31.890
I don't like Frosty.

00:25:32.050 --> 00:25:32.850
Frosty sucks.

00:25:33.010 --> 00:25:33.970
Do you like Frosty?

00:25:34.290 --> 00:25:34.930
Oh, I'm sorry.

00:25:35.250 --> 00:25:41.970
Like Wendy's Frosties, but it's like that in the the burgermeister meister burger.

00:25:42.050 --> 00:25:42.210
Yeah.

00:25:42.370 --> 00:25:42.610
That one.

00:25:42.690 --> 00:25:42.770
Yeah.

00:25:43.570 --> 00:25:44.930
That one's that's the one I'm thinking of.

00:25:45.090 --> 00:25:47.410
That's that's uh Santa Claus coming to town.

00:25:47.490 --> 00:25:48.210
I haven't seen those in a long time.

00:25:48.370 --> 00:25:49.330
He doesn't let him have toys.

00:25:49.490 --> 00:25:49.730
Yeah.

00:25:49.890 --> 00:25:50.610
He's me.

00:25:51.010 --> 00:25:51.890
He's German.

00:25:52.130 --> 00:25:52.450
Yeah.

00:25:52.610 --> 00:25:53.490
He's not German.

00:25:53.730 --> 00:25:54.530
Nine toys.

00:25:56.130 --> 00:25:57.810
Chris Kringle, like Santa Claus's name?

00:25:57.970 --> 00:25:59.810
The person who's saying that that just sounds stupid.

00:25:59.890 --> 00:26:03.570
It's like Yeah, I think in some lore, yeah, it is Chris Kringle.

00:26:04.050 --> 00:26:07.730
His name is Chris, and he gets adopted by L's when Kringle's came.

00:26:07.970 --> 00:26:08.930
I wonder if that started it.

00:26:09.090 --> 00:26:09.570
Yeah, it did.

00:26:09.730 --> 00:26:10.050
Did it?

00:26:10.130 --> 00:26:10.210
Yeah.

00:26:10.610 --> 00:26:12.370
The movie started the whole Kris Kringle thing.

00:26:12.610 --> 00:26:14.130
Yeah, that movie's old as hell, too.

00:26:14.210 --> 00:26:16.290
It's like from the 70s.

00:26:17.810 --> 00:26:19.490
You hear that people born in the 70s?

00:26:19.570 --> 00:26:20.610
I'm looking at you, Dad.

00:26:20.770 --> 00:26:21.490
You old piece of shit.

00:26:21.810 --> 00:26:23.410
You don't know how to use a computer.

00:26:23.810 --> 00:26:25.810
He does not got a TikTok.

00:26:25.890 --> 00:26:26.850
I think he's even got a following.

00:26:27.250 --> 00:26:27.570
What?

00:26:27.730 --> 00:26:28.210
Yeah.

00:26:28.610 --> 00:26:28.930
What?

00:26:29.170 --> 00:26:30.770
I've never even started a profile.

00:26:31.090 --> 00:26:32.210
Shut up, dude.

00:26:32.850 --> 00:26:34.290
I'm looking that up later.

00:26:34.370 --> 00:26:34.850
Yeah.

00:26:35.330 --> 00:26:35.650
Huh?

00:26:35.810 --> 00:26:36.930
No, God, no.

00:26:37.490 --> 00:26:38.610
On TikTok.

00:26:38.930 --> 00:26:40.130
That's crazy.

00:26:40.370 --> 00:26:42.130
At some point he had a following.

00:26:42.370 --> 00:26:43.090
That's crazy.

00:26:43.330 --> 00:26:45.810
Because my sister sent me a video and I was like, what the fuck?

00:26:48.050 --> 00:26:50.370
They shouldn't even be legally allowed to use it.

00:26:50.530 --> 00:26:52.210
Yeah, that should be an age limit.

00:26:52.450 --> 00:26:55.490
It's like it's like that's like gingerbilly.

00:26:55.570 --> 00:26:58.130
You know, as funny as they are, like, dude, no man.

00:26:58.370 --> 00:27:03.650
It's like under 15 and over 60 should be that's the cap.

00:27:03.730 --> 00:27:05.410
You got this window right here.

00:27:05.570 --> 00:27:07.330
That's your social media cap.

00:27:08.050 --> 00:27:08.690
Yeah.

00:27:10.770 --> 00:27:11.410
Yeah.

00:27:11.890 --> 00:27:12.770
I hate TikTok.

00:27:13.010 --> 00:27:14.050
I like your Christmas sweater.

00:27:14.210 --> 00:27:14.450
Thank you.

00:27:14.530 --> 00:27:15.330
I've had it for years.

00:27:15.410 --> 00:27:16.210
Obviously, you can tell.

00:27:16.290 --> 00:27:19.810
Like, I put it on and was like, holy shit, it's to be red.

00:27:20.130 --> 00:27:22.450
My wife has more than me.

00:27:22.770 --> 00:27:24.690
It looks like your wife wears it.

00:27:25.330 --> 00:27:26.530
Believe it or not, it's mine now.

00:27:26.610 --> 00:27:27.890
It it matches well with mine.

00:27:28.050 --> 00:27:28.690
I like your Christmas.

00:27:29.010 --> 00:27:32.850
We're we're definitely festive fucking people right now.

00:27:33.250 --> 00:27:33.890
Yay!

00:27:34.450 --> 00:27:35.970
You guys ready for Christmas?

00:27:36.370 --> 00:27:37.330
As ready as I'll ever be.

00:27:37.570 --> 00:27:38.770
What do you what do you think you're getting?

00:27:38.850 --> 00:27:40.050
What's Santa getting you?

00:27:42.610 --> 00:27:43.730
My daughter's here.

00:27:44.290 --> 00:27:45.170
She's 16.

00:27:45.330 --> 00:27:46.210
I can't say.

00:27:53.410 --> 00:27:57.330
I was giving her some shit, and I'm sitting there, I'm sitting at the desk and I'm I'm playing Xbox.

00:27:57.970 --> 00:28:02.530
And I said something to her, and she goes, if you don't want to shut the fuck up, this is what you're getting.

00:28:02.610 --> 00:28:04.450
And I was like, is that what I think it is?

00:28:04.530 --> 00:28:05.010
She goes, Yeah.

00:28:05.090 --> 00:28:06.290
And I was like, ooh.

00:28:07.170 --> 00:28:07.570
Ow.

00:28:07.810 --> 00:28:09.490
It only hurts the first time.

00:28:09.890 --> 00:28:11.490
That's what she tried saying.

00:28:11.890 --> 00:28:13.010
Not taking that chance.

00:28:17.170 --> 00:28:17.410
Yeah.

00:28:17.490 --> 00:28:19.650
And don't do it.

00:28:19.810 --> 00:28:20.050
Yes.

00:28:21.170 --> 00:28:22.690
Or was it a couple years ago?

00:28:22.850 --> 00:28:24.770
What country was it that had the giant was it Peter?

00:28:25.010 --> 00:28:25.970
Yeah, the giant.

00:28:26.210 --> 00:28:30.130
The giant green Christmas tree that didn't look like a Christmas tree.

00:28:30.850 --> 00:28:33.730
Someone's like, oh, this will look pretty.

00:28:34.850 --> 00:28:36.930
People are like, you're fucking stupid.

00:28:37.570 --> 00:28:38.210
It's great.

00:28:38.450 --> 00:28:39.810
I love your accents.

00:28:39.890 --> 00:28:42.130
I'm I'm not I don't know.

00:28:42.530 --> 00:28:44.210
Because a Hispanic guy was visiting France.

00:28:44.290 --> 00:28:44.610
I don't know.

00:28:44.850 --> 00:28:45.810
I'm not good.

00:28:46.210 --> 00:28:49.250
I can do impressions, but I can't do accents.

00:28:49.410 --> 00:28:50.770
Does that make sense?

00:28:51.090 --> 00:28:52.770
I'm better at them when I'm not trying.

00:28:52.850 --> 00:29:06.770
Like if I'm sitting at the house and make one, I'm generally better until like I draw it on too long and it goes from like my daughter just said, from like French to Spanish to German to it's a guy's, you know, beer hole putts and whatnot.

00:29:06.850 --> 00:29:07.330
You know what I mean?

00:29:07.570 --> 00:29:13.090
We uh we were playing Red Dead Redemption 2 yesterday, while I was and and they were watching me.

00:29:13.250 --> 00:29:18.130
Um and I was like I was sitting there and Adam comes over.

00:29:18.210 --> 00:29:21.810
I'm like, oh jeepers, Adam, you're gonna have to get out of here.

00:29:21.970 --> 00:29:23.730
We gotta go find Dutch.

00:29:25.490 --> 00:29:30.210
Lindsay looks at me and I was like, get used to that for the foreseeable future.

00:29:31.490 --> 00:29:32.370
That's great.

00:29:32.610 --> 00:29:33.410
Oh man.

00:29:37.170 --> 00:29:39.010
Oh, I love that game so much.

00:29:39.250 --> 00:29:41.170
I actually I did not.

00:29:41.410 --> 00:29:41.970
Really?

00:29:42.290 --> 00:29:43.010
I did not.

00:29:43.250 --> 00:29:44.290
The first one or the second one?

00:29:44.530 --> 00:29:44.770
Second one.

00:29:44.930 --> 00:29:45.730
Never played the first one.

00:29:45.890 --> 00:29:47.090
And everyone gives you.

00:29:47.730 --> 00:29:48.850
I don't think I gave it a chance.

00:29:48.930 --> 00:29:49.810
I don't think I gave enough.

00:29:50.130 --> 00:29:50.610
Maybe not.

00:29:50.770 --> 00:29:52.210
Because like I never played the online.

00:29:52.610 --> 00:29:53.810
I yeah, I haven't done that.

00:29:53.970 --> 00:29:57.010
And Derek, like, he loves, or he did at one point love the online.

00:29:57.250 --> 00:29:58.290
I've watched him play before.

00:29:58.450 --> 00:29:59.250
And it did look fun.

00:29:59.330 --> 00:30:00.450
I just never gave it a chance.

00:30:00.530 --> 00:30:06.050
I think the campaign or the story mode, like, shit's just like too far apart.

00:30:06.130 --> 00:30:06.370
Yeah.

00:30:07.090 --> 00:30:08.290
Like there's like nothing there.

00:30:08.690 --> 00:30:11.490
And you pray for a random encounter, and then you get murked.

00:30:11.890 --> 00:30:12.130
Yeah.

00:30:12.530 --> 00:30:14.850
It's like, oh well, it's just me then, right?

00:30:14.930 --> 00:30:16.930
Like, I I still haven't beat the campaign.

00:30:17.090 --> 00:30:19.090
I know the ending because I watched it online.

00:30:19.410 --> 00:30:20.290
Still haven't beat it.

00:30:20.450 --> 00:30:21.090
Didn't he die?

00:30:21.250 --> 00:30:21.570
Yeah.

00:30:21.810 --> 00:30:23.010
I'm at 71%.

00:30:23.410 --> 00:30:25.650
I've been at 71% for like four years.

00:30:25.890 --> 00:30:26.290
That sucks.

00:30:27.090 --> 00:30:28.770
Play a game where the character just dies.

00:30:28.850 --> 00:30:30.370
I guess that's the whole point of online now.

00:30:30.610 --> 00:30:32.530
Ah, the story's so good, though, dude.

00:30:32.610 --> 00:30:36.210
From start to finish, like the story is incredible.

00:30:36.530 --> 00:30:38.450
It's so, it's so good.

00:30:39.090 --> 00:30:40.610
You gotta like westerns.

00:30:40.690 --> 00:30:41.410
You gotta like westerns.

00:30:41.490 --> 00:30:42.290
I love westerns.

00:30:44.290 --> 00:30:50.610
It is I like anything like medieval, western or in space.

00:30:50.930 --> 00:30:51.250
Yeah.

00:30:51.410 --> 00:30:51.970
Like that's it.

00:30:52.130 --> 00:30:52.690
Yeah.

00:30:54.770 --> 00:30:55.170
What?

00:30:55.490 --> 00:30:56.210
Which one?

00:30:57.410 --> 00:30:58.450
It's a whole genre on its own.

00:30:58.770 --> 00:30:59.490
Like, I love this movie.

00:30:59.570 --> 00:31:01.410
Yeah, we're not supposed to watch that anymore.

00:31:01.810 --> 00:31:02.450
Oh, well, yeah.

00:31:02.770 --> 00:31:03.970
He called them Indians.

00:31:05.250 --> 00:31:07.650
Yeah, it's like, well, you know, it's not really PC.

00:31:07.890 --> 00:31:09.090
How about you go fuck yourself?

00:31:09.970 --> 00:31:11.570
Listen, John Wayne said it.

00:31:13.330 --> 00:31:14.130
There you go.

00:31:14.370 --> 00:31:17.970
Um I John Wayne.

00:31:19.090 --> 00:31:20.930
It was his like TV name.

00:31:21.090 --> 00:31:23.490
I mean, he did he didn't use that name when he was doing birthday parties.

00:31:23.650 --> 00:31:30.610
Uh, just so you know, most actors most actors that's not their name.

00:31:33.010 --> 00:31:39.410
Could you imagine could you imagine having to like run your life with a different name all the time?

00:31:39.970 --> 00:31:44.850
But like late, because there's actors that don't get famous until like their 30s or 40s.

00:31:45.010 --> 00:31:48.210
Could you imagine being Steve for 30 years?

00:31:48.450 --> 00:31:51.490
And then one day you're like, my name's Axel.

00:31:52.370 --> 00:31:54.610
Yeah, no, I know exactly what that feels like though.

00:31:54.930 --> 00:32:04.290
So I went by Chris or Christopher for 16 years, and then my now wife started calling me you know asshole bastard.

00:32:04.610 --> 00:32:06.690
I just automatically answered you now, so we're good.

00:32:07.010 --> 00:32:09.650
Okay, I don't know the dog's name for 16 years.

00:32:10.930 --> 00:32:11.410
Just dog?

00:32:11.730 --> 00:32:12.130
Just dog?

00:32:12.210 --> 00:32:13.010
I don't know what you're talking about.

00:32:15.570 --> 00:32:16.370
Caylan, Chris.

00:32:16.690 --> 00:32:17.010
Oh, yeah.

00:32:17.090 --> 00:32:19.650
So in full disclosure, guys, I have five kids.

00:32:19.890 --> 00:32:25.090
And so it's one of those things where like you you go to holler for one of them because you're and you say seven different names.

00:32:25.250 --> 00:32:31.090
Yeah, you know, because you're a lazy piece of shit, you don't want to get up, but you you're really thirsty, and you're like, hey, Kalen winner.

00:32:31.250 --> 00:32:33.410
Uh George, who the fuck is George?

00:32:33.490 --> 00:32:34.610
Get me a drink.

00:32:39.170 --> 00:32:40.530
You guys act the same.

00:32:41.730 --> 00:32:44.210
You're you're both lovable assholes.

00:32:46.370 --> 00:32:47.730
You, because it's my house.

00:32:49.650 --> 00:32:51.410
But uh, we gotta get her mic.

00:32:51.650 --> 00:32:53.250
A little pin on my yeah, I know.

00:32:53.330 --> 00:32:55.010
We should I have plenty of spots there.

00:32:55.090 --> 00:32:56.050
We could definitely do it, Mike.

00:32:56.290 --> 00:32:59.330
When when we're recording, it's just like, hey, God?

00:32:59.890 --> 00:33:01.010
God, is that you?

00:33:01.650 --> 00:33:02.210
Can't be.

00:33:02.450 --> 00:33:03.730
Sounds like a woman.

00:33:06.770 --> 00:33:07.650
His image.

00:33:07.890 --> 00:33:08.450
His image.

00:33:08.690 --> 00:33:09.250
Oh man.

00:33:09.490 --> 00:33:09.970
That's a joke.

00:33:10.050 --> 00:33:11.650
That's a joke, everybody.

00:33:14.530 --> 00:33:15.890
Mine either.

00:33:16.930 --> 00:33:19.090
Um what was I saying?

00:33:19.250 --> 00:33:21.250
Something about uh Westerns.

00:33:21.410 --> 00:33:22.610
Yeah, oh yeah, yeah.

00:33:22.690 --> 00:33:30.850
So so I'm 71% through uh hoping to get that done over break and be done with that story.

00:33:31.090 --> 00:33:33.090
But like that story is so great, man.

00:33:33.330 --> 00:33:34.130
I still own it.

00:33:34.210 --> 00:33:41.810
So I mean I might have to delete some stuff and download it, but dude, I was playing yesterday and I come up on a random encounter.

00:33:42.050 --> 00:33:43.810
Guy's trying to hunt this bear.

00:33:44.050 --> 00:33:50.850
So I start following him and I watch this bear eat him, just full, full on devour him.

00:33:51.010 --> 00:34:01.570
I shoot the bear, I kill it, I load it up, I skin it, get his pelt, load it up, put it on the back of this guy's horse, which is now my horse.

00:34:01.730 --> 00:34:03.170
What am I supposed to do with this horse?

00:34:03.250 --> 00:34:04.290
You know, shoot it.

00:34:04.530 --> 00:34:15.090
So I take his horse, I load up the pelt, and then I ride his horse after I looted his dead body, because it's like you're not gonna leave that stuff laying around.

00:34:15.329 --> 00:34:22.289
So I ride his horse out to the camp, I get off, and I'm like, well, I'm gonna search his satchel.

00:34:22.530 --> 00:34:35.889
I go to search his satchel, horse kicks me in the jaw, I fucking die from dysentery, I lose the pelt, the horse, all of his stuff.

00:34:36.129 --> 00:34:39.569
Oh, that's that's enough to piss you off after you spent the last hour and a half.

00:34:39.969 --> 00:34:42.289
And it took me 15 minutes to get back to camp.

00:34:42.449 --> 00:34:45.569
They put me back where the fucking bear was.

00:34:46.689 --> 00:34:49.089
I had to ride my horse back to camp.

00:34:49.250 --> 00:34:59.649
So, what what I didn't care for, same with like uh Grand Theft Auto 5, story mode-wise, is fuck, where was I going with this?

00:34:59.730 --> 00:35:01.329
Oh, so I'm used to like Bethesda.

00:35:01.409 --> 00:35:01.730
You know what I mean?

00:35:01.889 --> 00:35:03.329
Like linear, yeah.

00:35:03.569 --> 00:35:07.170
Get out of the tutorial and you can literally run anywhere, start anything.

00:35:07.569 --> 00:35:09.489
But those missions are very story-driven.

00:35:09.569 --> 00:35:11.889
Like, yeah, it's A, then B, then C.

00:35:11.969 --> 00:35:16.369
There's no A, A1, A2, A3, you know, one of the infinite things you can do.

00:35:16.529 --> 00:35:16.769
Right.

00:35:16.929 --> 00:35:19.090
It's you have to do this and this and this and this.

00:35:19.250 --> 00:35:24.849
Like on Red Dead 2, I got to the part where I guess they they make it available, like you can steal carriages.

00:35:24.929 --> 00:35:26.289
Yeah, chop shop.

00:35:26.449 --> 00:35:27.090
Yep, you know what I mean?

00:35:27.170 --> 00:35:28.849
I was like, oh, this is dope from that point on.

00:35:28.929 --> 00:35:33.250
That's all I tried to do unsuccessfully every single time, every single time.

00:35:33.329 --> 00:35:34.690
And I was like, man, this is bullshit.

00:35:34.769 --> 00:35:37.329
And I think that's about the point that I sat it down.

00:35:37.409 --> 00:35:38.369
I was like, nah, I'm good.

00:35:38.529 --> 00:35:40.769
Dude, I'm a story guy.

00:35:41.009 --> 00:35:45.730
I want that that linear, give me point A to point B.

00:35:46.210 --> 00:35:47.090
Call of Duty story.

00:35:47.250 --> 00:35:47.889
Like, no, I hate that.

00:35:48.049 --> 00:35:48.369
Yeah, yeah.

00:35:48.449 --> 00:35:48.929
I hate that.

00:35:49.170 --> 00:35:53.569
Dude, I I used to love open world stuff, and I still do to an extent.

00:35:53.650 --> 00:35:55.409
Like Medieval Dynasty, I love that.

00:35:55.569 --> 00:35:57.009
Yeah, well, there's no, there's no story.

00:35:57.090 --> 00:35:57.730
Like, yeah, yeah.

00:35:58.049 --> 00:36:02.210
Either give me, yeah, either give me no story or one story.

00:36:02.369 --> 00:36:04.690
Like, I'm overwhelmed with Fallout 4.

00:36:04.929 --> 00:36:11.250
I'm still only like five, ten missions in, and I'm like, I I don't know what's next.

00:36:11.409 --> 00:36:12.929
I don't know where to go.

00:36:13.170 --> 00:36:16.289
I just want to know the linear side of this story.

00:36:17.329 --> 00:36:19.409
All the good stories are the side stories, right?

00:36:19.569 --> 00:36:21.809
The main one people argue about all day online.

00:36:22.449 --> 00:36:25.650
By the way, the institute, they're the good guys.

00:36:26.049 --> 00:36:28.049
If you disagree, go fuck yourself.

00:36:28.289 --> 00:36:30.849
Um, the institute, yeah, that's where it's at.

00:36:31.090 --> 00:36:33.250
And the enclave, unpopular opinion.

00:36:33.329 --> 00:36:33.730
I don't care.

00:36:33.889 --> 00:36:35.569
The enclave are the good guys.

00:36:37.730 --> 00:36:41.009
Like a better time going fucking yourself and listening to this guy's odd opinions.

00:36:41.090 --> 00:36:44.529
So I didn't enjoy fucking myself, though.

00:36:45.250 --> 00:36:46.210
I don't do that.

00:36:46.449 --> 00:36:47.170
You don't do that?

00:36:47.329 --> 00:36:47.650
No.

00:36:48.210 --> 00:36:50.369
No, we talked about that today, actually.

00:36:50.690 --> 00:36:51.969
Me and the wife.

00:36:53.009 --> 00:36:53.569
Yeah.

00:36:53.809 --> 00:36:55.809
You know, but uh, no, yeah.

00:36:55.969 --> 00:36:57.489
Fallout, uh, I love Fallout 4.

00:36:57.569 --> 00:36:59.569
All the good stories, the interesting ones, it's fun.

00:36:59.730 --> 00:37:01.009
Or those ones that take you 15, 20.

00:37:01.250 --> 00:37:02.369
Yeah, yeah, it's fun.

00:37:02.690 --> 00:37:05.009
Legend ZA, Pokemon Legend ZA.

00:37:05.170 --> 00:37:07.969
My brother-in-law just told me about, I think it was that one.

00:37:08.130 --> 00:37:10.289
I was like, dude, I don't know what that is because he wasn't saying Pokemon.

00:37:10.369 --> 00:37:11.809
He was just saying, oh, this and this and that.

00:37:11.969 --> 00:37:13.250
I was like, what that what are you doing?

00:37:13.329 --> 00:37:14.289
What game are you talking about?

00:37:14.929 --> 00:37:16.449
You would, you would yeah, you would love it.

00:37:16.529 --> 00:37:17.090
Yeah, you would love it.

00:37:17.250 --> 00:37:18.690
Well, it's for the Switch 1, also.

00:37:18.849 --> 00:37:20.369
Oh, maybe this is not the one he's talking about.

00:37:20.449 --> 00:37:21.090
Is there a new one?

00:37:21.250 --> 00:37:22.130
Well, that is the new one.

00:37:22.289 --> 00:37:22.849
Okay, that's it.

00:37:23.170 --> 00:37:27.809
They're marketing it as Switch 2, but it you can stick down the yeah.

00:37:28.049 --> 00:37:35.250
Everyone that I've seen that played it on Switch 1 said it runs as good as the Switch 2, maybe a little slower, but nothing crazy.

00:37:35.489 --> 00:37:37.170
But not like a difference like Scarlet and Violet.

00:37:37.329 --> 00:37:39.650
No, my brother-in-law, he was like, dude, it runs so good on the Switch 2.

00:37:39.730 --> 00:37:43.889
I was like, I heard literally it was supposed to be a Switch 2 game, but they were dragging ass.

00:37:44.049 --> 00:37:47.569
Like they weren't able to release the Switch 2, and they're like, Well, we have this game, we have to release it.

00:37:47.809 --> 00:37:54.769
Literally, when I put Scarlet and Violet into the Switch 2 and saw the difference, I was like, I didn't think it didn't it didn't look bad.

00:37:54.849 --> 00:37:56.929
Then again, I'm not crazy, I'm not a critic.

00:37:57.009 --> 00:37:57.650
Like, you know what I mean?

00:37:57.730 --> 00:37:58.529
Like it's a playable game.

00:37:58.610 --> 00:37:59.730
I'm used to Bethesda.

00:37:59.809 --> 00:38:01.250
Is it a playable game?

00:38:02.130 --> 00:38:04.130
Does it crash more than twice?

00:38:04.289 --> 00:38:04.769
You're fine.

00:38:04.929 --> 00:38:06.369
Yeah, you can bug over it.

00:38:06.610 --> 00:38:07.250
You know what I mean?

00:38:07.569 --> 00:38:09.409
Like, oh my game.

00:38:10.210 --> 00:38:15.489
No, dude, Scarlet and Violet just it wasn't it wasn't so much the graphics that bothered me.

00:38:15.569 --> 00:38:17.569
I mean, the graphics to me looked fine.

00:38:17.730 --> 00:38:19.250
There were some horrific spots.

00:38:19.489 --> 00:38:22.929
I think it was definitely the graphics were definitely worse than Sword and Shield.

00:38:23.090 --> 00:38:25.650
Yeah, but not not deep.

00:38:25.969 --> 00:38:28.049
But it was the performance that bothered me.

00:38:28.130 --> 00:38:34.369
It was like oh, you mean like you walking into a new area and getting 30 steps in and then a Pokemon five foot, and you're like, oh shit, nope.

00:38:34.610 --> 00:38:41.969
Well, that, or like you're walking into an area and the game starts to clip, and you're like, ooh, we might be crashing right here.

00:38:42.049 --> 00:38:42.529
I don't know.

00:38:42.690 --> 00:38:43.250
We're gonna see.

00:38:43.409 --> 00:38:45.250
I've never had Pokemon crash all the time, dude.

00:38:45.489 --> 00:38:46.849
Sword and Shield, I've never had them crash.

00:38:46.929 --> 00:38:48.929
Not Sword and Shield, only Scarlet and Violet.

00:38:49.009 --> 00:38:49.650
Oh shit, my bad.

00:38:49.889 --> 00:38:53.170
Scarlet and Violet, I would get into like the the lake area.

00:38:53.250 --> 00:38:55.650
I forget it's like Casaroya or something like that.

00:38:55.809 --> 00:38:58.849
I want to say mine's never crashed on me unless I was playing for like 10 hours.

00:38:59.009 --> 00:39:00.289
Yeah, oh yeah, I played a lot.

00:39:01.329 --> 00:39:03.569
I think I have 480 hours on that game.

00:39:04.049 --> 00:39:04.690
One sitting.

00:39:04.929 --> 00:39:06.690
Oh yeah, my switch would be hot.

00:39:07.009 --> 00:39:07.809
Yeah, yeah.

00:39:08.049 --> 00:39:12.289
I would play it in handheld mode until the battery was about to die.

00:39:12.449 --> 00:39:17.730
And then plug it up, dock it, and start playing it again until the battery charged.

00:39:17.809 --> 00:39:19.569
Yeah, I mean, I probably would play that.

00:39:19.650 --> 00:39:21.489
I would do 10 hours on that game easy.

00:39:21.730 --> 00:39:23.090
So I had the switch light.

00:39:23.170 --> 00:39:27.730
So I mean, I was lucky to get three and a half, four hours of gameplay and then have to plug it in.

00:39:27.809 --> 00:39:28.130
Yeah.

00:39:28.289 --> 00:39:30.529
And then continue playing because the battery is dead.

00:39:30.610 --> 00:39:34.769
I'm not like but ZA, you would love ZA.

00:39:35.170 --> 00:39:36.369
It is what I hate.

00:39:37.250 --> 00:39:41.489
The Pokemon games, now that I'm an adult and buy them, I can, I have the ability to.

00:39:41.650 --> 00:39:42.610
It's like Call of Duty.

00:39:42.690 --> 00:39:44.769
Where it's like by the time you're like, oh fuck you.

00:39:45.889 --> 00:39:46.289
Guess what?

00:39:46.369 --> 00:39:47.170
We've got a new one.

00:39:47.250 --> 00:39:49.969
And it's like, uh good thing is Pokemon Home.

00:39:50.049 --> 00:39:53.329
That's the only thing saving, in my opinion.

00:39:53.409 --> 00:39:55.969
It's like, oh man, I spent all this time training this.

00:39:56.049 --> 00:39:58.049
Oh, let's switch it to home, put it on the new game.

00:39:58.210 --> 00:39:58.610
Yep.

00:39:59.009 --> 00:40:05.809
I will say, because of what I know about you and Bethesda and side missions, ZA is the game for you, dude.

00:40:05.969 --> 00:40:06.210
Really?

00:40:06.369 --> 00:40:09.250
Does the side missions make that game playable?

00:40:09.409 --> 00:40:10.769
The story, it's fine.

00:40:10.929 --> 00:40:13.889
Is it Scarlet Violet Violet esque where the story kind of sucks?

00:40:14.049 --> 00:40:15.889
No, the story's actually pretty solid.

00:40:16.130 --> 00:40:21.170
Um, game freak and Pokemon have really understood that we're all 30 now.

00:40:21.730 --> 00:40:23.009
Pokemon kind of 40.

00:40:24.849 --> 00:40:26.690
Pokemon, Pokemon, Pokemon, Pokemon.

00:40:27.009 --> 00:40:28.369
Nintendo's coming for us.

00:40:28.690 --> 00:40:32.049
Um, but it's like they understand that we're 30 now.

00:40:32.210 --> 00:40:43.969
So they're presenting stories that are still ground level enough that children can play and enjoy, but elevated enough to where it's like we recognize the emotional impact.

00:40:44.289 --> 00:40:44.929
It g yeah.

00:40:45.009 --> 00:40:50.049
I would like to see an adult version where it's like my parents were murdered.

00:40:50.289 --> 00:40:52.369
Dude, that's where the side missions come in.

00:40:52.610 --> 00:40:52.690
Oh

00:40:55.650 --> 00:40:56.449
No, full on.

00:40:56.529 --> 00:41:07.889
Like there's a side mission in there where you help an old lady find her wedding ring that's lost in a graveyard because she put it on her husband's gravestone and a Pokemon stole it.

00:41:08.529 --> 00:41:10.849
There's children were murdered and they just turned into Pokemon.

00:41:11.250 --> 00:41:11.809
That is also true.

00:41:12.449 --> 00:41:13.250
That is also true.

00:41:13.489 --> 00:41:15.170
But so you have to find the ring, right?

00:41:15.250 --> 00:41:16.529
And then you give it back to her.

00:41:16.610 --> 00:41:18.769
And then she's like she turns into a ghost.

00:41:18.929 --> 00:41:24.049
No, she's like telling you about like when she dies, she hopes that Pokemon can take her ring too.

00:41:24.130 --> 00:41:26.690
It like gives you this whole emotional backstory.

00:41:26.849 --> 00:41:49.329
There's a pet abuse one where you find um, spoiler alert, you find a uh Finnegan, which is a fire starter from Gen 6, um, that's like dying from starvation, and like you have to help it, but then during helping it from the starvation, you find out the backstory of like the abuse that it went through and it was just abandoned on the street.

00:41:49.569 --> 00:41:51.569
Oh, so you can't find this trainer and beat him to death.

00:41:51.730 --> 00:41:52.210
Right.

00:41:52.610 --> 00:41:53.090
It's great.

00:41:53.329 --> 00:41:55.329
The side missions are great, they're so good.

00:41:57.170 --> 00:42:00.449
Charizard, yes, Charmander, yeah, yeah.

00:42:00.610 --> 00:42:04.289
I mean, they were doing it back then too, but they didn't put it in the games.

00:42:04.849 --> 00:42:05.329
Yeah.

00:42:05.650 --> 00:42:06.289
Good game though.

00:42:06.690 --> 00:42:06.929
Good game.

00:42:08.769 --> 00:42:09.730
They had it back then too.

00:42:10.049 --> 00:42:11.650
Just now you can't really see it.

00:42:11.969 --> 00:42:13.009
Yeah, yeah.

00:42:13.170 --> 00:42:13.809
Yeah, I don't know.

00:42:13.889 --> 00:42:15.250
I don't physically abuse my children.

00:42:15.329 --> 00:42:21.170
I psychologically abuse pox and pans at three o'clock, you know, like my parents did to me.

00:42:23.409 --> 00:42:24.289
Oh man.

00:42:24.929 --> 00:42:27.569
Um, yeah, I I guess that's all I have.

00:42:27.730 --> 00:42:28.929
I can't think of anything else.

00:42:29.090 --> 00:42:34.769
I I was gonna um do some rhetorical, or not rhetorical, uh uh some would you rathers.

00:42:35.170 --> 00:42:37.009
Let's do some of those real quick.

00:42:37.569 --> 00:42:39.250
Sorry, I'm gonna look 'em up.

00:42:40.849 --> 00:42:42.849
Uh would you rather be a cat or a dog?

00:42:43.969 --> 00:42:44.210
Dog.

00:42:44.529 --> 00:42:45.170
Hamster.

00:42:45.409 --> 00:42:46.049
Let's do these.

00:42:46.449 --> 00:42:46.769
Keep going.

00:42:46.929 --> 00:42:47.250
Dog.

00:42:47.329 --> 00:42:47.809
100%.

00:42:48.769 --> 00:42:49.090
No?

00:42:49.569 --> 00:42:50.529
You wouldn't want to be a dog.

00:42:51.730 --> 00:42:52.529
Dogs are trained.

00:42:52.610 --> 00:42:53.809
The cat can just sit there and they go.

00:42:57.250 --> 00:43:01.170
So you could dogs are cuter.

00:43:04.529 --> 00:43:06.289
When you see a stray dog, you're gonna run away from it.

00:43:06.449 --> 00:43:10.769
You see a stray cat, you're gonna be like you run away from stray dogs?

00:43:11.650 --> 00:43:11.969
I don't.

00:43:12.210 --> 00:43:13.009
That's mean.

00:43:13.409 --> 00:43:13.569
Okay.

00:43:13.809 --> 00:43:14.690
How do you know it's a stray?

00:43:16.929 --> 00:43:18.130
It's status.

00:43:18.610 --> 00:43:19.730
We live in the middle of nowhere.

00:43:19.809 --> 00:43:20.289
They're not strays.

00:43:20.690 --> 00:43:21.730
No, they're they're hunting dogs.

00:43:21.809 --> 00:43:22.849
They're not abandoned.

00:43:24.529 --> 00:43:28.529
Where we live, if you see a stray dog, it's a hunting dog or a coyote.

00:43:29.730 --> 00:43:30.610
Ain't that the truth?

00:43:30.849 --> 00:43:31.650
Oh, yeah, dude.

00:43:31.809 --> 00:43:35.329
So look, so I'm working out of town at the at this time years back.

00:43:35.489 --> 00:43:41.809
And uh and my wife sends me a picture of this this this puppy they found.

00:43:42.690 --> 00:43:44.210
How do you find a puppy?

00:43:44.369 --> 00:43:45.809
Well, they thought they found a puppy.

00:43:46.130 --> 00:43:47.730
They found a baby coyote.

00:43:48.130 --> 00:43:49.329
Oh, no way, man.

00:43:49.489 --> 00:43:49.889
Yeah, dude.

00:43:49.969 --> 00:43:52.130
I was like, put it in the kennel right now.

00:43:52.289 --> 00:43:54.529
And I was like, this is gonna be dope.

00:43:54.690 --> 00:43:57.409
And then they're like, no, we're gonna we're gonna go put it back in the woods.

00:43:57.489 --> 00:44:01.889
And I'm like, well, if you do that, you get my glock because mama's hanging around somewhere.

00:44:02.049 --> 00:44:07.409
There was other pups in the in the patch of oh, I was like, Oh, this is gonna be sweet.

00:44:08.610 --> 00:44:10.289
Have you ever seen that dude that had a coyote?

00:44:10.369 --> 00:44:11.489
He raised a coyote.

00:44:11.730 --> 00:44:19.409
No, but I've heard stories of people like mistakenly thinking they had a dog until it's like six months old and they take it to the vet and they're like, Yeah, this isn't a fucking dog.

00:44:19.650 --> 00:44:21.409
He goes, he he's got this coyote.

00:44:21.489 --> 00:44:23.170
It's him, it's a coyote and a dog.

00:44:23.250 --> 00:44:27.329
He's got a coyote and a dog, and he has the coyote like go and get him beer.

00:44:27.489 --> 00:44:41.170
It's pretty like, dude, he takes these little videos of him like hanging out on like a cliff, and like he'll be like, Give me a beer, and the coyote goes in the cooler and grabs him a beer and brings it over, and then it nips at him and he goes, Quit yarring me, and he slaps it around.

00:44:41.329 --> 00:44:42.289
It's great, dude.

00:44:42.529 --> 00:44:43.809
Oh, it's so awesome.

00:44:44.049 --> 00:44:47.090
I uh I did at the flea market in Richmond.

00:44:47.250 --> 00:44:48.690
I think this is illegal.

00:44:48.929 --> 00:44:49.409
I don't know.

00:44:49.650 --> 00:44:50.769
Probably I don't own it anymore.

00:44:50.849 --> 00:44:52.610
So what's the statue of limitations?

00:44:53.329 --> 00:44:54.369
I mean, this was shoot.

00:44:54.449 --> 00:44:58.769
I was 17, 18?

00:44:58.849 --> 00:44:59.170
I don't know.

00:44:59.250 --> 00:44:59.730
Yeah, it's right.

00:44:59.809 --> 00:45:03.009
You were both you were you were yeah, you were you were like two.

00:45:03.489 --> 00:45:05.489
Um I went, I had my own place.

00:45:05.650 --> 00:45:07.809
So I got my GED like super duper early.

00:45:07.889 --> 00:45:09.329
Yeah, 17 had my own place.

00:45:10.690 --> 00:45:14.210
I did rent the house next to my parents' house, okay, but not from them.

00:45:14.369 --> 00:45:20.130
There's no generational wealth there, it's generational poverty, and uh which arguably is better.

00:45:20.529 --> 00:45:22.610
I mean, it's a lot less things to worry about.

00:45:22.769 --> 00:45:23.569
Uh escrow?

00:45:23.809 --> 00:45:24.210
What is that?

00:45:24.289 --> 00:45:25.250
I can't even spell that.

00:45:25.730 --> 00:45:26.449
Escargo.

00:45:29.889 --> 00:45:31.569
I mean by that I mean French.

00:45:31.809 --> 00:45:36.690
Um, but uh I bought a coyote pelt, uh-huh, hung it on my wall.

00:45:36.849 --> 00:45:37.569
It was so dope.

00:45:37.650 --> 00:45:41.730
Someone's like, hey man, you know, you really shouldn't, you know, you're not supposed to be able to buy and sell stuff like that.

00:45:41.809 --> 00:45:43.090
I was like, it's a Richmond flea market.

00:45:43.250 --> 00:45:44.369
I bought it from a crackhead.

00:45:44.449 --> 00:45:45.170
I don't care.

00:45:47.250 --> 00:45:53.090
Would you rather fight one horse-sized duck or a hundred duck-sized horses?

00:45:53.329 --> 00:45:54.690
A hundred duck-sized horses.

00:45:54.929 --> 00:45:56.130
A hundred duck-sized horses.

00:45:56.610 --> 00:45:57.650
A hundred duck-sized horse.

00:45:57.889 --> 00:45:58.849
You just kick.

00:46:00.449 --> 00:46:02.849
Ducks are aggressive, and that's pretty big.

00:46:03.170 --> 00:46:05.329
A horse-sized duck.

00:46:05.650 --> 00:46:06.529
But like one?

00:46:06.690 --> 00:46:07.569
Like a fist fight?

00:46:08.130 --> 00:46:09.250
See, this is what I hate about these.

00:46:09.409 --> 00:46:10.449
They're like vague enough.

00:46:10.610 --> 00:46:12.849
Like with just what I have in my house.

00:46:13.090 --> 00:46:13.250
See.

00:46:15.569 --> 00:46:16.210
Let's go.

00:46:16.369 --> 00:46:16.929
Let's go.

00:46:17.090 --> 00:46:17.409
Yeah.

00:46:17.489 --> 00:46:18.769
Let's go with no no.

00:46:19.090 --> 00:46:21.489
Anything I could grab on the way running out the door.

00:46:21.730 --> 00:46:22.929
Let's go public.

00:46:23.329 --> 00:46:24.289
You're in public.

00:46:24.369 --> 00:46:26.610
So whatever's like around you in public.

00:46:26.849 --> 00:46:28.849
So like no guns.

00:46:29.090 --> 00:46:29.889
We'll leave the guns.

00:46:30.130 --> 00:46:31.569
We'll leave the gun you have in public.

00:46:31.809 --> 00:46:32.849
No, I'll leave the gun out.

00:46:33.730 --> 00:46:37.489
Um I want like I want maces and like a stick.

00:46:37.809 --> 00:46:38.929
I don't have these in my car.

00:46:39.170 --> 00:46:40.210
Like a stop sign.

00:46:40.690 --> 00:46:42.929
But also you're not getting a stop sign.

00:46:43.250 --> 00:46:43.489
I take it.

00:46:43.569 --> 00:46:43.889
I take it back.

00:46:43.969 --> 00:46:44.210
I take it back.

00:46:44.369 --> 00:46:44.849
I've a car back.

00:46:45.009 --> 00:46:45.489
I have a car.

00:46:45.650 --> 00:46:46.929
Give me the give me the duck.

00:46:47.170 --> 00:46:49.090
I I'm going with the horse-sized duck.

00:46:49.170 --> 00:46:51.170
No, I'm going with the the duck-sized horses?

00:46:51.329 --> 00:46:51.889
Yeah, dude.

00:46:52.049 --> 00:46:53.489
Dude, they kick though.

00:46:53.650 --> 00:46:54.449
Yeah, but they're this big.

00:46:54.529 --> 00:46:56.210
It's like a chihuahua kicking you.

00:46:56.369 --> 00:46:58.769
I mean, they're like it's like a beagle.

00:46:59.009 --> 00:47:01.730
But with like the brute force of a horse.

00:47:01.969 --> 00:47:06.369
No, it's no, it's not like Ant-Man where he shrinks down and still has the strength of a horse.

00:47:06.610 --> 00:47:10.130
It's their horse-sized, or there's duck-sized horses.

00:47:10.369 --> 00:47:10.529
Yeah.

00:47:10.849 --> 00:47:13.009
They don't have the strength of a duck.

00:47:13.889 --> 00:47:15.090
They're this big.

00:47:15.569 --> 00:47:16.289
I don't know, man.

00:47:16.369 --> 00:47:18.210
Those it's like curb stump.

00:47:18.369 --> 00:47:19.250
Curb stomp.

00:47:19.409 --> 00:47:20.130
You know what I mean?

00:47:22.929 --> 00:47:24.049
You just need to piss it off.

00:47:24.289 --> 00:47:27.170
Like even then, it's not gonna like maul you and eat your remains.

00:47:27.250 --> 00:47:28.130
It's gonna like get you.

00:47:29.250 --> 00:47:31.329
It's gonna pick you up and sling you around.

00:47:31.809 --> 00:47:32.769
I'm too old for that.

00:47:33.009 --> 00:47:38.289
But also, like also like a duck's mouth the size of a horse.

00:47:39.090 --> 00:47:40.849
It could take an arm for sure.

00:47:41.009 --> 00:47:42.690
Have you ever have you ever messed with a duck?

00:47:42.929 --> 00:47:44.210
Yes, we have ducks on the property.

00:47:44.369 --> 00:47:49.969
Dude, they're their beaks, man, when they latch on, like if they get your finger, you losing a finger.

00:47:50.049 --> 00:47:51.809
Oh, you think you lose a finger?

00:47:52.130 --> 00:47:52.529
What?

00:47:53.329 --> 00:47:54.849
What kind of ducks are you talking about?

00:47:55.090 --> 00:47:55.569
Big ones.

00:47:55.730 --> 00:47:56.449
Fucking big ones.

00:47:56.690 --> 00:47:57.889
Horse size ducks.

00:47:58.130 --> 00:47:59.009
I seen them.

00:47:59.489 --> 00:48:01.489
One fucking kill Dutch.

00:48:01.809 --> 00:48:03.329
Get over here, Dutch.

00:48:03.569 --> 00:48:04.929
Easy girl.

00:48:08.449 --> 00:48:09.329
No, I take the horse.

00:48:09.409 --> 00:48:12.130
I take the hundred the hundred duck size voices.

00:48:12.690 --> 00:48:13.569
All day.

00:48:16.049 --> 00:48:17.090
I'm not gonna do it.

00:48:17.170 --> 00:48:19.489
I was it would be so funny.

00:48:19.730 --> 00:48:25.250
It would be so funny to have somebody do Red Dead Redemption.

00:48:25.569 --> 00:48:26.849
Like mob the shit out of it.

00:48:27.090 --> 00:48:43.969
But like the just the voices, but like imagine like imagine like uh uh that scene where where Will Smith got slapped, or where Chris Rock got slapped.

00:48:44.610 --> 00:48:51.090
But it's it's Arthur Morgan class out of your motherfucking mouth.

00:48:51.250 --> 00:48:53.329
This is the greatest night in television.

00:48:55.809 --> 00:48:57.090
Oh man.

00:48:57.650 --> 00:48:59.170
Uh let's see here.

00:49:00.289 --> 00:49:06.529
Would you rather always be sticky or always smell faintly like onions?

00:49:06.769 --> 00:49:09.650
I feel like I already always smell like onions.

00:49:09.809 --> 00:49:15.409
Uh eventually I'm gonna go nose blind to it, and so are the people I care what they smell like.

00:49:15.969 --> 00:49:16.289
Yeah.

00:49:16.449 --> 00:49:19.809
Like are you feel sticky or other people touch you and you feel sticky?

00:49:20.049 --> 00:49:21.329
You're always sticky.

00:49:21.409 --> 00:49:25.170
Like if I touch the table, it's gonna leave sticky residues.

00:49:25.489 --> 00:49:25.650
Yeah.

00:49:25.889 --> 00:49:26.849
No, onions all day.

00:49:27.170 --> 00:49:30.210
That that or like somebody touches you and they're like, oh, you're sticky.

00:49:30.369 --> 00:49:32.529
Yeah, see, I don't think onions smell that bad.

00:49:34.529 --> 00:49:43.809
Because people can people compare like certain people with body odor to like, oh, it smells like onions, but then you smell onions as in like you're dicing them to cook and you're like, oh shit, this smells good.

00:49:43.969 --> 00:49:47.889
Yeah, but also like love is like 70% smell.

00:49:48.130 --> 00:49:55.090
So like if you're if you're yeah, if you're with the person you're supposed to, if the person loves you, they're gonna love your set.

00:49:56.929 --> 00:49:57.569
We're fine.

00:49:57.809 --> 00:50:00.610
When you fall in love with somebody, you fall in love with everything about them.

00:50:00.769 --> 00:50:13.250
So this doesn't match up because it's actually it's your body, mostly known for when you smell something that smells sweet or nice to you, like the person's other it's it's what your body is telling you like, oh, for like offspring, this is like the perfect person.

00:50:13.730 --> 00:50:17.170
Yeah, back uh back to a conversation we had in the car.

00:50:17.409 --> 00:50:23.329
Very controversial when it comes to loving someone and their smell being a major factor in there.

00:50:23.489 --> 00:50:36.849
Uh I I read this thing where they talked about girls, women, before you before you uh get in a committed relationship or decide to marry a guy that you should go if you are on birth control, you should go off because it changes your sense of smell.

00:50:37.009 --> 00:50:43.009
Whereas in you might like the guy and be like, oh man, yeah, he got back from the gym.

00:50:43.090 --> 00:50:43.969
He smells so good.

00:50:44.130 --> 00:50:47.569
Yeah, it because you know, but then they get off.

00:50:47.650 --> 00:50:51.409
There's stories of them getting off, like after getting off birth control.

00:50:51.809 --> 00:50:55.650
Um there's plenty of stories of them getting off, man.

00:50:55.730 --> 00:50:56.690
I'm sure.

00:50:57.170 --> 00:51:04.130
And then like trying to have a baby later on in the relationship, and then in the process not having the attraction, yeah, and the attraction is gone.

00:51:04.289 --> 00:51:05.730
I was like, that's fucking weird.

00:51:05.889 --> 00:51:08.289
Look more into it, and there's a bunch of stories that way.

00:51:08.369 --> 00:51:12.210
And I'm like, hmm, hmm, I'm glad my wife stayed on.

00:51:14.610 --> 00:51:15.569
I don't know, man.

00:51:15.650 --> 00:51:23.969
I think I'm a new parent, so you've dealt with this far more than I have, but there's nothing worse than a sticky kid, dude.

00:51:24.130 --> 00:51:25.730
Oh, dude, it makes my skin crawl.

00:51:26.210 --> 00:51:27.409
Comes over with stuff over.

00:51:27.650 --> 00:51:29.329
I'm like, oh, go see your mother.

00:51:29.409 --> 00:51:30.210
Get the fuck out of here.

00:51:30.449 --> 00:51:30.849
Ask face.

00:51:31.170 --> 00:51:31.650
Oh my god.

00:51:31.730 --> 00:51:36.849
I don't know how often one of the boys will run up to me and I'll be like, girls, give me a baby wife.

00:51:38.610 --> 00:51:54.529
Dude, so my mom brought cookies for Christmas, and uh I opened up the box and I saw one cookie that she made for Adam and had red icing on it and then yellow, like weird, like gel icing.

00:51:54.769 --> 00:51:58.929
I looked at Lindsay and I was like, because she was upstairs, not my wife, my mom.

00:51:59.009 --> 00:52:01.170
She was upstairs uh changing Adam's diaper.

00:52:01.409 --> 00:52:07.409
And I was like, when she comes back down here, I'm gonna tell her he can't have because she specifically made this cookie for him.

00:52:07.650 --> 00:52:11.969
So I'm like, I'm gonna tell her she can't that he can't have it because it's got red dye 40 on it.

00:52:13.889 --> 00:52:19.889
She came down and I was like, hey mom, I know you made this cookie, it's got red dye 40, he can't have it.

00:52:19.969 --> 00:52:20.449
I'm sorry.

00:52:20.690 --> 00:52:23.409
Just like Alec Jones said, it's smoking the kids cake.

00:52:23.969 --> 00:52:32.130
So, so so she she I thought she was gonna be very upset, and instead she was like, Okay, I don't care.

00:52:32.289 --> 00:52:34.929
And I was like, uh, that ruined my joke.

00:52:35.250 --> 00:52:36.690
He can have it, he can have it.

00:52:39.170 --> 00:52:40.449
I got some of those chips.

00:52:40.529 --> 00:52:43.730
They started doing the chips without stuff on them, the Doritos.

00:52:44.049 --> 00:52:44.369
Really?

00:52:44.529 --> 00:52:47.809
Yeah, like with it's got like none, no dyes, no artificial anything.

00:52:47.969 --> 00:52:48.210
Really?

00:52:48.289 --> 00:52:48.690
Yeah, I got it.

00:52:48.849 --> 00:52:50.529
I heard they were doing it, I just haven't seen them in the store.

00:52:50.690 --> 00:52:52.849
There's a bag in my cupboard right now.

00:52:52.929 --> 00:52:53.809
I haven't opened them yet.

00:52:53.889 --> 00:52:57.889
But I was like, See, they're trying to reach their homeschool market.

00:52:58.210 --> 00:52:58.610
Should we do it?

00:52:58.690 --> 00:52:59.730
Should we do it here on the show?

00:52:59.889 --> 00:53:01.969
No, no, no, okay.

00:53:02.210 --> 00:53:04.210
No, what if it makes me want to kiss you?

00:53:04.610 --> 00:53:06.529
I still don't see an issue.

00:53:07.889 --> 00:53:10.369
No, like isn't that what they have in like most other countries?

00:53:10.529 --> 00:53:13.650
Is like like most of Europe, all that crap's banned, Canada?

00:53:13.969 --> 00:53:14.369
Probably.

00:53:14.690 --> 00:53:20.049
I think dude, we were at Walmart two days ago, and Lindsay looks over.

00:53:20.130 --> 00:53:26.769
We're in the checkout line, and she looks over and she sees a little bag of Lay's, and it says, now with real potatoes.

00:53:27.009 --> 00:53:28.289
What the fuck were they searching?

00:53:28.610 --> 00:53:31.409
Dude, dude, she goes, That's alarming.

00:53:31.569 --> 00:53:34.449
And I look and I'm like, that can't be real.

00:53:34.529 --> 00:53:37.090
That's gotta be a marketing scheme or something.

00:53:37.650 --> 00:53:38.769
Yes, I care.

00:53:39.009 --> 00:53:40.369
Absolutely.

00:53:40.929 --> 00:53:45.329
No, before, before I didn't care, I care now.

00:53:47.489 --> 00:53:48.130
Tastes good.

00:53:48.690 --> 00:53:51.009
Yeah, yeah, I'm that way with like hot dogs and stuff.

00:53:51.090 --> 00:53:52.130
It's like I don't care what's in it.

00:53:52.289 --> 00:53:57.170
Well, so then I get out of the line and I go and try and find a bag of just regular ass lays.

00:53:57.650 --> 00:53:58.529
Gone, dude.

00:53:58.610 --> 00:53:59.969
They all say that now.

00:54:00.049 --> 00:54:01.969
They just say now with real potatoes.

00:54:02.049 --> 00:54:05.489
And I'm like, that's so fucking scary.

00:54:06.130 --> 00:54:13.650
They could they could be a marketing thing where that's it hasn't changed, but at one point in time for like a month, they tried using fake potatoes, and they're like, now.

00:54:13.809 --> 00:54:17.889
Well, they just mean now, as in at one point in time in history, they weren't real potatoes.

00:54:18.369 --> 00:54:19.409
Cook thing they did.

00:54:19.730 --> 00:54:28.849
I could, I could buy that, but I also worked at McDonald's for the crossover to the real chicken, chicken nuggets.

00:54:29.569 --> 00:54:34.210
So, like, there was the chicken nuggets that were not chicken.

00:54:34.449 --> 00:54:46.849
Yeah, no, I heard this, I heard this, um, I heard this story of this uh this woman whereas in like growing up, like she thought she was allergic allergic to chicken, but like I guess they didn't eat chicken that household a whole bunch.

00:54:46.929 --> 00:54:53.569
I don't know the I don't know the full backstory, but every time she would get chicken, like a chicken nugget kids' meal, right?

00:54:53.809 --> 00:54:55.569
Like she would break out in hives real bad.

00:54:55.650 --> 00:54:55.809
Yeah.

00:54:56.289 --> 00:54:59.329
So like her mom stopped cooking chicken the whole nine yards.

00:54:59.569 --> 00:55:07.409
And then later on, she did some kind of like college research thing and come to find out like it was mostly not chicken.

00:55:07.569 --> 00:55:08.049
Yeah, dude.

00:55:09.170 --> 00:55:10.210
And it's like, what the hell?

00:55:10.369 --> 00:55:18.130
Yeah, they were mixing like anything that was like byproduct meat of like, hey, here's a bucket of everything we just couldn't use at this factory.

00:55:18.289 --> 00:55:21.730
And McDonald's was like, fuck it, we'll grind it up and put it in food.

00:55:21.969 --> 00:55:27.809
And then they made the little molds of chicken nuggets, and then that's what they made us eat for a long time.

00:55:28.049 --> 00:55:37.250
That explains a whole lot about our and then I and then I was working there, and they were like, Hey, we're switching over to real chicken, and I was like, What?

00:55:37.569 --> 00:56:00.130
Like, first off, what the fuck is a fake chicken chicken nuggets, so I remember like the crossover, and then they switched to the grease also at the same time, and then I had like the first batch at that McDonald's of the new chicken nuggets, and I was like, I don't know what we were eating before, but this this is what we should have been eating.

00:56:00.210 --> 00:56:01.250
This is real food.

00:56:01.329 --> 00:56:02.690
This tastes incredible.

00:56:02.849 --> 00:56:03.090
What?

00:56:03.409 --> 00:56:03.809
Oh, yeah.

00:56:04.049 --> 00:56:05.569
I've never not liked chicken nuggets.

00:56:05.889 --> 00:56:09.329
Dude, the difference you probably didn't realize the difference.

00:56:09.569 --> 00:56:11.009
I always dipped in barbecue sauce.

00:56:11.090 --> 00:56:11.250
Yeah.

00:56:12.289 --> 00:56:21.650
Yeah, you probably I mean, that was that was like 20 fuck, like 2010, I think, is when that changeover happened.

00:56:21.969 --> 00:56:22.369
Really?

00:56:22.610 --> 00:56:23.489
Yeah, I know, right?

00:56:23.569 --> 00:56:24.449
It wasn't that long ago.

00:56:24.690 --> 00:56:25.090
No, it wasn't.

00:56:25.329 --> 00:56:25.409
Yeah.

00:56:26.289 --> 00:56:29.569
Then again, I was an adult and only stole my kids' chicken nuggets.

00:56:29.889 --> 00:56:30.049
Right.

00:56:30.210 --> 00:56:42.929
You know, but like, yeah, they they actively put the same spices and stuff in to try and keep the flavor there, but like the thickness, the the crispiness all comes from the switch over.

00:56:43.409 --> 00:56:43.969
Yeah.

00:56:45.650 --> 00:56:46.210
I don't know.

00:56:46.369 --> 00:56:51.090
Like, um, I feel like if I had like actually, I don't know when this was, but I'm trying to see it.

00:56:51.250 --> 00:56:57.409
But I feel like I would have noticed because when I was little, my dad traumatized me from using sauces because he once just once.

00:56:57.489 --> 00:56:58.049
I only took once.

00:56:58.449 --> 00:57:02.849
I was eating chick with chicken with ketchup and he goes, Is your mother cooking not good enough to have plain?

00:57:05.809 --> 00:57:06.690
I still do it.

00:57:06.849 --> 00:57:07.489
I still do it.

00:57:07.569 --> 00:57:12.049
So I'll tell the kids like hope will cook steak or uh pork chops or something like that.

00:57:12.130 --> 00:57:17.329
And and I'll normally eat first, not first, but like I normally dig in before they do.

00:57:17.889 --> 00:57:24.049
And uh and I've seen them do it because I used to give them grief about the steak is good.

00:57:24.130 --> 00:57:25.170
I don't know why you need a one.

00:57:25.409 --> 00:57:25.889
You know what I mean?

00:57:26.130 --> 00:57:29.809
Or like I don't need I don't know why you need a gallon of ranch with that chicken, you know what I mean?

00:57:32.130 --> 00:57:33.009
It's like we're white.

00:57:33.090 --> 00:57:33.730
We know it's not.

00:57:36.849 --> 00:57:40.529
So they'll see me like go over and grab something, they'll be like, okay, yeah, we're good.

00:57:40.690 --> 00:57:41.889
We can put ketchup on it.

00:57:42.049 --> 00:57:44.769
I think the point is I'd definitely rather smell like onions.

00:57:44.929 --> 00:57:46.369
I'd smell like onions, yeah, definitely.

00:57:47.809 --> 00:57:48.610
Circle back.

00:57:54.130 --> 00:57:54.929
All right, all right.

00:57:55.090 --> 00:58:01.569
How about uh would you rather know the date of your death or the cause of your death?

00:58:03.409 --> 00:58:03.969
Date.

00:58:04.210 --> 00:58:04.610
Date.

00:58:04.769 --> 00:58:05.730
I'd rather know the date.

00:58:06.289 --> 00:58:07.889
But just think, just think.

00:58:08.289 --> 00:58:12.449
If you know the cause of your death, you're it's gonna be like you die in a car accident.

00:58:12.529 --> 00:58:14.130
Well, I'm never riding in a fucking car again.

00:58:14.289 --> 00:58:14.529
That's true.

00:58:14.769 --> 00:58:15.090
You know what I mean?

00:58:15.650 --> 00:58:21.889
That'll scare you from experiences where if you know the date, I mean, let's go final destination universe here.

00:58:22.049 --> 00:58:23.329
You're dead no matter what.

00:58:23.489 --> 00:58:24.130
You know what I mean?

00:58:24.369 --> 00:58:28.849
So at least then it's like, I have this much time left on this earth.

00:58:29.809 --> 00:58:31.250
You know, this is what I'm gonna do.

00:58:31.329 --> 00:58:33.250
Instead of like a shark's gonna kill you.

00:58:33.329 --> 00:58:36.289
Not if I live in Montana, and then Shark NATO happens.

00:58:36.369 --> 00:58:42.610
What's it's like it's like a school aspect where it's like, you know, these couple days where you just don't care what you do, you don't care about the consequences.

00:58:42.849 --> 00:58:43.569
That is true.

00:58:43.809 --> 00:58:44.769
That is true.

00:58:47.809 --> 00:58:50.210
It's like turning in your two-week notice.

00:58:50.529 --> 00:58:51.569
Yeah, yeah.

00:58:51.889 --> 00:58:55.489
Yeah, like a like a little bit of like, oh, I'm gonna do whatever the fuck I want to.

00:58:55.809 --> 00:58:57.809
I know, yeah, I I know I'm out of here.

00:58:58.449 --> 00:59:00.130
I'd rather know the date.

00:59:00.610 --> 00:59:03.489
Um, I also agree, I would rather know the date.

00:59:03.569 --> 00:59:12.369
What's crazy is technology's getting to a point where like we're not far off from that being a possibility, or at least natural causes.

00:59:12.610 --> 00:59:14.769
Yeah, like they can kind of narrow down now.

00:59:14.849 --> 00:59:15.650
Like, they have that.

00:59:15.730 --> 00:59:25.889
Have you seen that machine where like you go stand in it and they do a full body scan and they can tell you, like, hey, here's a list of everything wrong with you that we can identify.

00:59:26.049 --> 00:59:27.250
No, here are the changes.

00:59:27.329 --> 00:59:29.090
Oh, yeah, dude, that's a real thing.

00:59:35.409 --> 00:59:37.329
Wrong opinions, check.

00:59:37.409 --> 00:59:39.730
Um repeal the 19th, check.

00:59:39.969 --> 00:59:48.690
But literally, you go stand in this machine and it does a full body scan, and it can it they're using it to like detect cancer and stuff and like diseases and hereditary issues.

00:59:49.329 --> 00:59:52.369
That's if you trust machines, and I'm sure there's some kind of AI element with that.

00:59:52.449 --> 00:59:59.329
And oh yeah, fuck the clankers, but also the cost is not like crazy.

00:59:59.569 --> 01:00:00.369
It's not, yeah.

01:00:00.529 --> 01:00:13.730
Like you and I can afford to like you can't go afford to do it every year, obviously, but like it's within reason of like five grand roughly, you know, like it's not it's not out of the realm of possibility.

01:00:14.210 --> 01:00:14.849
Insurance covers it.

01:00:15.090 --> 01:00:15.569
I think they do.

01:00:15.809 --> 01:00:15.969
Really?

01:00:16.130 --> 01:00:16.529
I think they do.

01:00:17.569 --> 01:00:24.849
They don't know if this is like 100% true, but I remember seeing a couple videos where it's a very probably planning to go to a different country with a great medical program.

01:00:25.170 --> 01:00:27.809
Yes, that's one thing.

01:00:28.610 --> 01:00:32.610
See all the different specialists, and then like you'd get like a whole thing of like something.

01:00:33.009 --> 01:00:34.049
Like a medical tourist.

01:00:34.369 --> 01:00:35.569
Yeah, basically, yeah.

01:00:39.650 --> 01:00:41.969
Yep, yep, it's kinda like going it's now cheaper.

01:00:42.049 --> 01:00:45.489
I mean, I'm sure everyone's seen the article because it's popped up on like ten different things.

01:00:45.650 --> 01:00:50.610
It is now cheaper to fly to Japan, go to Disney, Japan.

01:00:51.009 --> 01:00:52.929
Than to go to Disney in Florida and then fly back.

01:00:53.489 --> 01:00:56.849
Cheaper to do all of that than to go to any of the US locations.

01:00:57.170 --> 01:00:57.730
That's crazy.

01:00:58.049 --> 01:00:59.489
And I'm like, ah, fuck it, I could do that.

01:00:59.650 --> 01:01:00.289
Japan sounds cool.

01:01:01.889 --> 01:01:03.569
I'm sure they're way cooler.

01:01:03.889 --> 01:01:13.730
I actually know somebody who um did the Mario exhibit in Tokyo, Japan.

01:01:14.210 --> 01:01:16.690
Like built Mario World in Tokyo, Japan.

01:01:16.849 --> 01:01:17.569
So that's pretty cool.

01:01:17.650 --> 01:01:17.809
Yeah.

01:01:17.969 --> 01:01:19.409
Yeah, they live here in Virginia.

01:01:19.569 --> 01:01:19.889
Really?

01:01:20.049 --> 01:01:20.610
Yeah.

01:01:20.849 --> 01:01:21.090
Yeah.

01:01:21.170 --> 01:01:23.409
I used to have them, they would come and visit.

01:01:23.569 --> 01:01:27.409
Like while they were stationed in Japan, they'd come and visit a couple times a year.

01:01:27.569 --> 01:01:30.369
And I'd have them bring me stuff from the Pokemon Center.

01:01:30.529 --> 01:01:31.489
They oh that's awesome.

01:01:31.809 --> 01:01:31.969
Yeah.

01:01:32.130 --> 01:01:33.889
I'd be like, hey, load up on whatever.

01:01:33.969 --> 01:01:35.489
It doesn't matter what it is, I'll take it.

01:01:41.569 --> 01:01:42.289
Oh god.

01:01:42.449 --> 01:01:43.969
They they have real Pokemon now.

01:01:44.130 --> 01:01:44.929
They've done it.

01:01:45.170 --> 01:01:46.690
They partnered with the Chinese.

01:01:46.769 --> 01:01:48.849
They've gotten over their World War II beef.

01:01:50.049 --> 01:01:52.210
Um, but no, dude, isn't that crazy though?

01:01:52.369 --> 01:01:55.569
You can just go and get a scan and it'll like like I want to do one.

01:01:55.650 --> 01:01:57.489
As a hypochondriac, I want to do one.

01:01:57.569 --> 01:01:58.049
No, I don't.

01:01:58.210 --> 01:01:58.929
Oh, dude, I do.

01:01:59.090 --> 01:01:59.409
Nope.

01:01:59.569 --> 01:02:05.250
I want to go and be like, all right, I'm gonna stand in this and you're gonna tell me everything that's wrong with me right now.

01:02:05.650 --> 01:02:05.969
Why though?

01:02:06.049 --> 01:02:06.929
So you can worry about it?

01:02:07.090 --> 01:02:08.289
No, so I go fix it.

01:02:09.650 --> 01:02:13.090
There's something wrong with me, wait till I drop, and that can be for like the corner.

01:02:13.650 --> 01:02:13.889
Amen.

01:02:14.130 --> 01:02:15.730
See, here here look, I'm here recently.

01:02:15.809 --> 01:02:17.969
I said I didn't think I was raising my kids right.

01:02:18.049 --> 01:02:19.409
I think I am because I'm the thing.

01:02:19.889 --> 01:02:20.690
But you know what?

01:02:20.929 --> 01:02:26.049
When the when the chest when the chest pains put me to the floor, then I'll go to the doctor.

01:02:26.210 --> 01:02:27.009
Oh no, dude.

01:02:27.090 --> 01:02:29.250
No, I am such the opposite.

01:02:29.489 --> 01:02:36.210
If my pinky starts hurting for more than 24 hours, I'm gonna be like, hey, this pain wasn't here.

01:02:36.369 --> 01:02:37.170
Now it is.

01:02:37.409 --> 01:02:49.170
Like, even with insurance, I've had my wife perform semi-minor medical procedures on me with a kit from Walgreens because I'm not going to the doctor.

01:02:49.329 --> 01:02:51.809
Oh, babe, let's just go to the ER.

01:02:51.889 --> 01:02:55.090
I'm not waiting fucking six hours in the ER.

01:02:55.409 --> 01:02:59.329
Like, I will shoot myself in the lobby to clear room for whoever stays.

01:02:59.409 --> 01:03:00.849
Like, I got no, he's cool.

01:03:01.009 --> 01:03:03.250
He just witnessed all this, he's gonna stay.

01:03:04.610 --> 01:03:05.969
I know this is a bit hypocritical.

01:03:06.049 --> 01:03:08.449
Like, my friends are gonna have a sneeze and like, you should go to a doctor about that.

01:03:12.610 --> 01:03:14.130
No, I tell people the same thing.

01:03:14.210 --> 01:03:16.210
Like, no, dude, you should go get that checked.

01:03:17.090 --> 01:03:19.809
Chris, your eyeballs popped out of your head, it's just dangling there.

01:03:19.889 --> 01:03:20.690
Like, I'll be fine.

01:03:20.769 --> 01:03:22.529
I'm gonna get my wife back in when I get home.

01:03:22.610 --> 01:03:23.329
This shit happens.

01:03:24.369 --> 01:03:27.250
I dislocated my knee, and doctors were like, Yeah, you're tore your ACL.

01:03:27.889 --> 01:03:28.449
No, I didn't.

01:03:29.170 --> 01:03:32.289
Turns out no, I got somebody scanned, and they're like, Yeah, we think, we think.

01:03:32.529 --> 01:03:34.929
And someone just looked at one and went, No, that's not it.

01:03:35.409 --> 01:03:36.769
What do you mean you tried to tell me?

01:03:36.849 --> 01:03:38.130
No, you just dislocated your knee.

01:03:38.210 --> 01:03:39.650
That's not what happens.

01:03:40.049 --> 01:03:40.929
That's crazy.

01:03:41.090 --> 01:03:42.929
That is a thing, trusting doctors.

01:03:43.170 --> 01:03:45.489
Well, so you know, it's like the dentist thing.

01:03:45.650 --> 01:03:50.049
Yeah, it's like if nine out of ten, what's what's the joke?

01:03:50.130 --> 01:03:54.529
Where it's like nine out of ten dentists, yeah, recommend this, go with the tenth.

01:03:54.849 --> 01:03:55.489
Yeah, yeah.

01:03:55.969 --> 01:03:58.449
It's like, because yeah, nine are getting paid.

01:03:58.690 --> 01:04:07.170
Um, no, I will go to a doctor for that pinky pain and I'll be like, hey, pinky started hurting yesterday and it hasn't stopped.

01:04:07.329 --> 01:04:09.009
I think I've got pinky cancer.

01:04:09.170 --> 01:04:15.889
And then they'll look at it and they'll be like, no, you're just fat and your circulation is fucked up, and that's why your pinky hurts.

01:04:15.969 --> 01:04:18.690
And I'll be like, they don't know what the fuck they're talking about.

01:04:22.210 --> 01:04:30.049
So like I'm that guy that's like, I need to go to the doctor, but when they tell me what I don't want to hear, I'm like, I'll get to it, lady.

01:04:30.130 --> 01:04:31.090
Don't worry.

01:04:33.489 --> 01:04:39.569
So I no joke, I have had this pain in my inner thigh for almost a year now.

01:04:39.809 --> 01:04:41.489
I went to the doctor, I waited.

01:04:41.569 --> 01:04:44.049
I waited six months to finally go to the doctor about it.

01:04:44.210 --> 01:04:51.969
I go in and I'm like, hey, look, there's this pain in my inner thigh that's been there consistently for six months.

01:04:52.289 --> 01:04:57.489
Normally I would have been here day two, but I waited it out because I was like, this I'm a man.

01:04:57.650 --> 01:05:00.369
I was like, this feels like a muscular thing, you know what I mean?

01:05:00.449 --> 01:05:00.610
Yeah.

01:05:00.769 --> 01:05:02.610
So she feels around and whatnot.

01:05:02.849 --> 01:05:04.610
And she's like, you don't have a hernia.

01:05:04.769 --> 01:05:05.809
And I was like, cool.

01:05:05.969 --> 01:05:07.409
I kind of assumed that I did.

01:05:07.489 --> 01:05:09.409
So that gives me a little bit of a breather.

01:05:09.569 --> 01:05:10.449
What do we think it is?

01:05:10.529 --> 01:05:14.210
She was like, probably a strain or a sprain or a tor muscle.

01:05:14.369 --> 01:05:15.329
I was like, great.

01:05:15.569 --> 01:05:16.690
It's been six months.

01:05:16.849 --> 01:05:17.809
When is it gonna stop?

01:05:17.969 --> 01:05:21.009
She goes, could be another six months, could be six years.

01:05:21.170 --> 01:05:21.889
I have no idea.

01:05:23.409 --> 01:05:24.449
Thanks for the copay.

01:05:24.610 --> 01:05:25.329
Go fuck yourself.

01:05:25.569 --> 01:05:28.610
Literally$300 later, and I still have that pain.

01:05:29.489 --> 01:05:32.289
Dude, just call me from now on when you think you have to go to the doctor.

01:05:32.449 --> 01:05:34.929
I'll be like, whiskey laudanum salt.

01:05:35.250 --> 01:05:38.690
Chris, my left testicle has been hurting for like 24 hours.

01:05:38.929 --> 01:05:40.289
We're gonna have to cut it off.

01:05:40.929 --> 01:05:43.090
Listen, my wife will get the gift from Walgreens.

01:05:43.250 --> 01:05:44.529
She gets a discount.

01:05:45.969 --> 01:05:48.289
Have you tried turning it off and turning it back on?

01:05:50.929 --> 01:05:51.650
Oh man.

01:05:51.809 --> 01:05:54.610
Let me put on my doctor's gloves and kick in the nuts.

01:05:55.250 --> 01:05:58.610
This is the same guy where I was like, I'll walk on my knee, and he goes, No, you can't.

01:05:58.690 --> 01:05:59.489
You're going to the EI.

01:05:59.809 --> 01:06:01.329
That's because I care about you.

01:06:01.650 --> 01:06:01.889
Yeah.

01:06:07.329 --> 01:06:09.090
We shouldn't ask the cannibalism question next.

01:06:09.329 --> 01:06:10.690
I think we cannibalism?

01:06:10.769 --> 01:06:12.369
What's the cannibalism question?

01:06:12.849 --> 01:06:16.130
Cause Discourse groups gonna be like, all right, guys, who would you eat first?

01:06:16.210 --> 01:06:17.409
I'm not asking a group of questions.

01:06:17.569 --> 01:06:18.610
We're gonna individual here.

01:06:18.690 --> 01:06:19.090
Order them.

01:06:19.329 --> 01:06:20.449
Oh, let's do it.

01:06:22.849 --> 01:06:23.889
Who would I eat first?

01:06:24.210 --> 01:06:30.529
So if it's the three of us in a small plane crash, what kind of environment are we being dropped into?

01:06:31.650 --> 01:06:32.610
We're gonna say snow.

01:06:32.929 --> 01:06:33.170
Arctic.

01:06:33.409 --> 01:06:33.809
Arctic.

01:06:33.969 --> 01:06:34.529
Snow.

01:06:35.809 --> 01:06:36.849
Is it the Chilean?

01:06:36.929 --> 01:06:38.449
No, no, that's that's the miners.

01:06:38.849 --> 01:06:39.090
Whoa.

01:06:39.329 --> 01:06:40.130
Was it was it Chilean?

01:06:40.289 --> 01:06:41.170
Weren't they also Chilean?

01:06:42.289 --> 01:06:45.569
Were they fly they were flying to Chile for a soccer match?

01:06:45.730 --> 01:06:46.929
I like the way you say chili.

01:06:47.090 --> 01:06:47.569
Chile.

01:06:47.809 --> 01:06:47.969
Chile.

01:06:48.130 --> 01:06:48.610
That's what it is.

01:06:48.690 --> 01:06:49.009
I think.

01:06:49.250 --> 01:06:49.889
Not chili.

01:06:50.369 --> 01:06:51.569
I mean, I like chili.

01:06:51.650 --> 01:06:54.769
Like you're definitely definitely going into a chili.

01:06:55.489 --> 01:06:55.969
Oh, yeah.

01:06:56.210 --> 01:06:57.409
I'm getting eaten first.

01:06:57.569 --> 01:06:58.449
Have you seen me?

01:06:58.690 --> 01:06:59.889
I've never flown.

01:07:00.049 --> 01:07:01.329
I've never flown.

01:07:01.650 --> 01:07:06.049
But we're preemptively preparing my body before the plane crashes.

01:07:06.369 --> 01:07:07.889
Honestly, whoever died first.

01:07:08.369 --> 01:07:09.170
Nah, dude.

01:07:09.329 --> 01:07:09.969
Yeah, man.

01:07:10.210 --> 01:07:13.170
No, I'm taking this diabetic leg right off.

01:07:13.329 --> 01:07:16.130
I'm gonna be like, Chris, there's a lot of meat on this bone, dude.

01:07:16.610 --> 01:07:17.090
High it up.

01:07:17.329 --> 01:07:18.130
Loop and guns.

01:07:18.449 --> 01:07:19.650
Jinners on me.

01:07:20.449 --> 01:07:21.409
Literally.

01:07:23.409 --> 01:07:26.449
But I am always gonna pack A1.

01:07:26.610 --> 01:07:28.369
But Dan Cummins told a bit.

01:07:28.529 --> 01:07:38.049
We're talking about where it's like, yeah, I know it's really fucked up, but now I pack A1 and every time I fly, I'm like, that's that's genius.

01:07:38.289 --> 01:07:39.250
Pack A1.

01:07:39.809 --> 01:07:41.250
Hey man, there you go.

01:07:41.409 --> 01:07:52.369
Um so we've already had this discussion on the other show, but scenario is you're eating a person, how are you preparing the body?

01:07:52.449 --> 01:07:54.849
Like, what's your I think gourmet experience?

01:07:55.090 --> 01:07:56.049
I think I said stew.

01:07:56.210 --> 01:07:57.090
You did say stew.

01:07:57.409 --> 01:07:58.289
I'm still gonna stick with that.

01:07:58.449 --> 01:07:59.329
You're sticking with stew?

01:07:59.409 --> 01:08:00.130
I'm sticking with stew.

01:08:00.610 --> 01:08:02.369
Dude, no, no, this is it.

01:08:02.449 --> 01:08:03.650
What what okay?

01:08:03.889 --> 01:08:05.090
What situation are we in?

01:08:05.170 --> 01:08:07.489
Are we at like some fucked up restaurant?

01:08:08.130 --> 01:08:10.210
Like in like, I don't know, the Amazon.

01:08:10.369 --> 01:08:11.170
Don't they still eat people?

01:08:11.329 --> 01:08:11.650
I don't know.

01:08:11.889 --> 01:08:13.009
You're in a cabin.

01:08:13.809 --> 01:08:17.250
You have five-star chefs in the cabin.

01:08:18.369 --> 01:08:22.930
You are agreeing that you are going to eat this body because you have to.

01:08:23.170 --> 01:08:24.210
Yeah, not because I want to.

01:08:24.369 --> 01:08:26.850
Not because you want to, stew, but I sort of want to.

01:08:27.250 --> 01:08:27.650
Stew.

01:08:29.010 --> 01:08:31.329
It's a beast challenge.

01:08:31.569 --> 01:08:32.690
Nice, nice, nice, nice.

01:08:32.930 --> 01:08:36.050
We put one guy in a cabin for five million dollars.

01:08:36.130 --> 01:08:37.010
He has to eat a body.

01:08:37.170 --> 01:08:41.730
Do I get is it is it like the pita thing where it's like, this is the cow you're eating.

01:08:41.810 --> 01:08:42.449
You know what I mean?

01:08:42.529 --> 01:08:43.889
Like a picture with a backstory.

01:08:44.289 --> 01:08:45.409
Oh, there's a backstory.

01:08:45.569 --> 01:08:47.489
No, I mean, like of the person you're eating.

01:08:47.729 --> 01:08:49.969
I'm gonna make you watch home videos.

01:08:50.529 --> 01:08:51.969
You have to it's still stew.

01:08:52.130 --> 01:08:52.609
It's still stew.

01:08:52.769 --> 01:08:53.250
Oh no, dude.

01:08:53.889 --> 01:08:54.210
No, dude.

01:08:54.289 --> 01:09:04.130
I'm tying a bib on I'm lighting candles, I'm projectoring his life, and I'm having me the nicest fucking leg steak you've ever had.

01:09:04.609 --> 01:09:07.329
No, it's still stew with like potatoes, carrots.

01:09:07.489 --> 01:09:11.010
Oh no, dude, we're gonna do some mashed brains on the side.

01:09:12.529 --> 01:09:16.449
We're gonna do a nice big old thicky of a steak.

01:09:16.529 --> 01:09:18.050
I'm talking three inches.

01:09:20.050 --> 01:09:25.569
You've been talking to my wife, and when I cut that thing, it better be cooked to perfection.

01:09:25.809 --> 01:09:28.130
It better be like just slightly pink.

01:09:28.449 --> 01:09:30.930
I hope that thing where like you get the shakes from eating people.

01:09:31.170 --> 01:09:33.409
I hope that's real, you son of a bitch.

01:09:34.050 --> 01:09:35.409
I feel like we should talk about this.

01:09:35.489 --> 01:09:37.409
There's this game called Cooking Companions, all right?

01:09:37.649 --> 01:09:43.569
It's a horror, it's um, it's a game about it's a horror game, and it's it's not like an open world or anything, it's like a set story, right?

01:09:43.649 --> 01:09:46.529
So you're following this future adventure, it's actually really good.

01:09:46.609 --> 01:09:47.010
I love it.

01:09:47.170 --> 01:09:48.289
It's all about cannibalism.

01:09:48.609 --> 01:09:52.130
You get snowed into this cabin and you have to like choose who to eat first.

01:09:52.609 --> 01:09:53.409
I'm so in.

01:09:53.729 --> 01:10:02.130
So first, like this mysterious meat showed up, and you kind of remember having this nightmare about chopping something, but you're not quite sure what.

01:10:02.769 --> 01:10:04.369
So you guys heard it here first.

01:10:04.609 --> 01:10:07.569
My 16-year-old daughter is pro-cannibalism.

01:10:08.369 --> 01:10:10.130
She is pro-cannibalism.

01:10:14.210 --> 01:10:18.050
So, like there's different dishes, like yeah, exactly.

01:10:18.289 --> 01:10:18.850
Yes.

01:10:20.930 --> 01:10:22.529
No, no, I'm so in.

01:10:22.930 --> 01:10:28.210
If I had to do it, like gun to my head, and then I'm gonna be eaten if I don't stew.

01:10:28.369 --> 01:10:32.529
Man, potatoes, carrots, like when I eat stew at the house, I don't get a lot of meat.

01:10:32.769 --> 01:10:34.609
I guess I just am that fat.

01:10:35.090 --> 01:10:37.970
Like I wouldn't eat anything.

01:10:38.289 --> 01:10:40.529
There's no meat that I look and see.

01:10:42.210 --> 01:10:43.649
Is there like an animal?

01:10:43.809 --> 01:10:45.729
Is there an animal that you feel the same way about?

01:10:45.970 --> 01:10:47.010
Well, that I wouldn't eat, yeah.

01:10:47.170 --> 01:10:49.409
No, I'd eat every animal, every animal, every single one.

01:10:49.569 --> 01:10:50.930
So, what's the difference?

01:10:51.170 --> 01:10:52.369
Would you eat a gorilla?

01:10:52.609 --> 01:10:53.489
Yeah, that'd be awesome.

01:10:53.649 --> 01:10:55.649
They're like 99% us.

01:10:55.970 --> 01:10:58.050
Listen, especially if I get to choose my gorilla.

01:10:58.289 --> 01:11:03.729
Like, you know, like you just choose your lobster or like you go to Texas Roadhouse and you want the smartest one.

01:11:03.890 --> 01:11:10.369
Get me the one that knows the best sign language, the one holding the bunny, bring him to me.

01:11:11.489 --> 01:11:12.449
Present him.

01:11:12.609 --> 01:11:14.609
That's why I can't win the lottery.

01:11:19.090 --> 01:11:21.649
You can't tell if a new neighbor is gay or cannibal.

01:11:22.930 --> 01:11:26.449
Both go under the radar so much.

01:11:26.609 --> 01:11:27.329
Jeffrey Dahmer.

01:11:30.050 --> 01:11:31.970
Yeah, it's hating on the community.

01:11:35.329 --> 01:11:37.250
Jeffrey Dahmer, and I'm sitting here like, was it use?

01:11:37.729 --> 01:11:38.930
He was charming.

01:11:39.329 --> 01:11:40.529
Probably was me.

01:11:41.010 --> 01:11:42.289
Really good with hand tools.

01:11:42.850 --> 01:11:45.090
Did you watch the Netflix series?

01:11:45.409 --> 01:11:45.649
I haven't.

01:11:45.970 --> 01:11:48.529
Let me talk about how bullshit that is.

01:11:49.010 --> 01:11:56.050
So, in this series, this man is murdering people in his apartment building.

01:11:56.210 --> 01:11:57.649
Have you ever been in an apartment building?

01:11:57.890 --> 01:11:59.729
Yeah, I've seen the pictures of his apartment building.

01:11:59.890 --> 01:12:04.930
Okay, so we all know that walls are paper thin.

01:12:05.170 --> 01:12:12.609
Like, you mean to tell me this dude was taking a 9/16 drill bit to the side of some dude's fucking head.

01:12:12.769 --> 01:12:14.850
Yeah, and pouring like battery acid in it.

01:12:15.010 --> 01:12:24.050
Yeah, and he's screaming literal bloody murder, and no one I don't remember.

01:12:24.289 --> 01:12:25.409
Because I could definitely take it.

01:12:25.489 --> 01:12:29.010
Because, like, in certain cities, you hear someone screaming, you're not going to go check it out.

01:12:29.090 --> 01:12:32.130
And depending on who you are, you're gonna play it on Tuesday.

01:12:32.369 --> 01:12:35.809
I wouldn't check it out, but I would certainly call somebody.

01:12:36.050 --> 01:12:37.569
Of course you would, snitch.

01:12:37.809 --> 01:12:38.609
Oh, yeah, yeah.

01:12:38.769 --> 01:12:40.689
I must say it's because you're not a New Yorker.

01:12:41.010 --> 01:12:43.170
If we have any New York listeners, you know what I mean?

01:12:43.409 --> 01:12:44.449
I'm sorry, but it's true.

01:12:44.609 --> 01:12:45.170
Get over it.

01:12:46.369 --> 01:12:49.569
Send in your favorite story like a disturbing sound and how you ignored it.

01:12:50.449 --> 01:12:52.769
And then I'll send that to the police.

01:12:53.010 --> 01:12:53.329
Yeah.

01:12:55.250 --> 01:12:59.329
See something, say something, you can be prosecuted.

01:13:00.449 --> 01:13:03.010
But no, dude, I would have called somebody.

01:13:03.250 --> 01:13:05.170
Somebody if I heard it.

01:13:05.729 --> 01:13:07.809
I think wasn't it like Missouri or something?

01:13:07.890 --> 01:13:11.809
It was some like backwoods, like crack-infested bullshit.

01:13:12.210 --> 01:13:13.090
Oh, Ohio.

01:13:13.250 --> 01:13:13.649
Yeah.

01:13:16.050 --> 01:13:17.569
Hear a scream like it's just a box.

01:13:17.729 --> 01:13:18.449
More screams.

01:13:18.529 --> 01:13:19.569
It's still just a box.

01:13:22.529 --> 01:13:23.329
I don't know.

01:13:23.489 --> 01:13:25.970
We had the remember that one time we had a fox.

01:13:27.250 --> 01:13:29.250
We had a fox on the back driveway.

01:13:30.050 --> 01:13:31.970
I thought it was a fucking chupacabra.

01:13:32.210 --> 01:13:33.250
Holy shit, dude.

01:13:33.569 --> 01:13:35.090
I've never heard it before in my life.

01:13:35.170 --> 01:13:35.649
Like for real.

01:13:35.729 --> 01:13:38.130
It was me, my wife, you.

01:13:38.609 --> 01:13:40.210
Was it one of those death whistles?

01:13:40.529 --> 01:13:41.250
Who went out to look?

01:13:45.729 --> 01:13:46.369
Yeah, yeah.

01:13:46.609 --> 01:13:50.210
Going down the high or going down the the through the yard, down the driveway.

01:13:50.369 --> 01:13:51.809
All I remember is I had my pistol.

01:13:51.890 --> 01:13:54.609
I was like, if this is a lady in white, she's getting shot.

01:13:54.769 --> 01:13:55.409
You guys are running.

01:13:55.569 --> 01:13:56.689
Like, I'm gonna do what I can.

01:13:58.930 --> 01:14:01.970
Yeah, it was I've never heard a fox scream until then.

01:14:02.449 --> 01:14:02.930
Dude.

01:14:05.569 --> 01:14:07.090
Ring a ding-ding-ding-a-ding.

01:14:08.689 --> 01:14:12.850
Scratched out sort of window, we found out what it was, and he came in playing what does the fox night like one in the morning.

01:14:13.090 --> 01:14:17.329
Hacky, hacky, hacky, hooky situation.

01:14:18.369 --> 01:14:18.850
It was that bad.

01:14:18.930 --> 01:14:19.569
It was that scary.

01:14:19.729 --> 01:14:21.890
Dude, I love that song that was like what does the fox night?

01:14:21.970 --> 01:14:23.170
That was my ringdone for a long time.

01:14:23.489 --> 01:14:24.050
I love the video.

01:14:24.210 --> 01:14:24.930
The video made it.

01:14:25.010 --> 01:14:26.369
Oh, it was great.

01:14:28.529 --> 01:14:29.809
Party of furries.

01:14:30.850 --> 01:14:32.130
In a mansion in the woods.

01:14:32.210 --> 01:14:32.449
Yeah.

01:14:34.850 --> 01:14:45.649
If you if you heard a lady screaming, like you like maybe not your house, but like if you lived like in a city like here, if you heard a lady screaming.

01:14:45.890 --> 01:14:46.449
I'm going.

01:14:46.689 --> 01:14:47.170
You're going?

01:14:47.329 --> 01:14:47.649
I'm going.

01:14:47.809 --> 01:14:48.130
You're going.

01:14:48.210 --> 01:14:49.569
I'm gonna call the police first, then I'm going.

01:14:50.210 --> 01:14:50.609
Oh yeah.

01:14:51.970 --> 01:14:52.689
Yeah, dude.

01:14:52.930 --> 01:14:54.689
Like then you need to make sure you record every single week.

01:14:54.769 --> 01:14:56.369
You'll be caught in the wrong place at the wrong time.

01:14:56.449 --> 01:14:57.329
You're like, we have reports.

01:14:57.809 --> 01:15:00.369
If you heard a man screaming, you still going?

01:15:00.529 --> 01:15:01.010
Yeah.

01:15:01.170 --> 01:15:02.529
Oh, you're a good person.

01:15:02.769 --> 01:15:03.970
Yeah, that's horrible, man.

01:15:04.210 --> 01:15:06.130
I'm locking the door and calling the cops.

01:15:06.289 --> 01:15:08.130
Oh no, I'm calling the police and going strapped.

01:15:08.210 --> 01:15:15.329
Like, not only am I calling the cops, but I'm also going to ask before I tell them anything if what I say is going to be anonymous.

01:15:15.649 --> 01:15:16.769
Oh no, I'm giving name it.

01:15:17.090 --> 01:15:18.289
Is this an anonymous tip?

01:15:18.609 --> 01:15:19.090
They know who it is.

01:15:19.250 --> 01:15:19.409
No?

01:15:19.489 --> 01:15:20.449
Okay, then I didn't hear it.

01:15:20.609 --> 01:15:22.289
Nothing you tell the police is anonymous.

01:15:22.449 --> 01:15:22.850
Nothing.

01:15:23.010 --> 01:15:24.210
Then I'm not calling the cops.

01:15:24.449 --> 01:15:25.329
See, that's horrible.

01:15:25.649 --> 01:15:26.210
See, I would go.

01:15:26.529 --> 01:15:26.769
Horrible.

01:15:26.850 --> 01:15:31.970
Then you come to find out like you're like a dude two houses down and his three kids were murdered in their home.

01:15:32.210 --> 01:15:37.090
Based off of what I recently found out about this neighborhood, I don't know if that's a bad thing.

01:15:38.449 --> 01:15:40.050
I made some bad choices, man.

01:15:40.210 --> 01:15:41.890
Yeah, but wait, what if you were screaming?

01:15:41.970 --> 01:15:44.930
Wouldn't you want one of your neighbors to maybe come see what was going on?

01:15:45.649 --> 01:15:48.130
As long as it's not Bob across the street.

01:15:48.449 --> 01:15:49.809
Is it the one with the RV?

01:15:50.609 --> 01:15:51.090
Yeah.

01:15:51.569 --> 01:15:52.529
I we pulled up.

01:15:52.609 --> 01:15:53.890
I said, Oh, there's an RV.

01:15:54.050 --> 01:15:55.890
I wonder if they're making myths.

01:15:57.010 --> 01:15:58.769
No, unfortunately not.

01:15:58.930 --> 01:15:59.729
Well, maybe.

01:15:59.809 --> 01:16:00.930
I don't know them that well.

01:16:01.090 --> 01:16:01.890
I don't think so.

01:16:02.050 --> 01:16:03.489
I thought I heard screaming.

01:16:03.729 --> 01:16:05.170
I hear screaming all the time.

01:16:05.649 --> 01:16:09.649
Someone's outside right now, like, well, and they're not right this second, but they've been like bassing the whole time.

01:16:09.729 --> 01:16:11.250
I was like, isn't it outside with the boom box?

01:16:11.409 --> 01:16:12.369
What the hell's going on?

01:16:12.689 --> 01:16:16.369
I hear screaming around here and gunshots constantly.

01:16:16.529 --> 01:16:18.369
I hear a bunch of gunshots out of my way.

01:16:18.529 --> 01:16:19.890
Yeah, but yours are fun.

01:16:20.210 --> 01:16:21.170
Mine are scary.

01:16:21.489 --> 01:16:22.529
Mine are yeehaw.

01:16:23.409 --> 01:16:23.569
Yeah.

01:16:25.890 --> 01:16:27.329
That is terrifying.

01:16:27.569 --> 01:16:31.489
Why why are there no like new ghosts?

01:16:31.729 --> 01:16:39.569
Why are every ghost story about I've seen a meme about that where it's like it's like it's yeah, it's Brittany bitch.

01:16:42.609 --> 01:16:50.210
Yeah, why is it that every time somebody talks about seeing a ghost, it's always a lady in white or like some old Civil War soldier?

01:16:50.369 --> 01:16:54.449
Also, why are there Civil War soldiers fucking everywhere?

01:16:54.609 --> 01:16:56.850
They were predominantly in one area.

01:16:57.170 --> 01:17:04.449
So why is a big area, but like yeah, but like why in New York are people like, yeah, it's a story of the old Civil War soldier?

01:17:04.529 --> 01:17:08.210
And you're like, honestly, you were nowhere close to the war.

01:17:11.010 --> 01:17:13.970
They never made it up that far in a bar fight.

01:17:14.130 --> 01:17:14.689
You know what I mean?

01:17:15.010 --> 01:17:16.130
Like it was dramatizing.

01:17:16.289 --> 01:17:17.569
Yeah, I don't know, man.

01:17:17.649 --> 01:17:20.529
It's just uh ghosts are hard to believe in.

01:17:21.010 --> 01:17:32.689
Yeah, I want to say I I I can't can't necessarily say I believe, but uh as my daughter sits across the table looking like the looking like one of the chicks from the the Ghostbusters movie.

01:17:34.210 --> 01:17:36.369
I was thinking stranger things.

01:17:37.170 --> 01:17:38.930
Oh, it could be, yeah.

01:17:39.170 --> 01:17:39.729
Yeah.

01:17:40.289 --> 01:17:40.850
That was fun.

01:17:43.170 --> 01:17:46.529
I don't watch Stranger Things, but like the older brother figure, like the old guy.

01:17:46.689 --> 01:17:49.489
He's like he's like the senior who's friends with Bresman, like that kind of vibe.

01:17:49.729 --> 01:17:50.930
The one who's into the one chick.

01:17:53.809 --> 01:17:55.090
I don't know what you're talking about there.

01:17:55.250 --> 01:17:57.809
I've watched everything but the new, the new, like five part of the thing.

01:17:57.890 --> 01:17:58.210
I gave up.

01:17:58.609 --> 01:17:59.649
I gave up on Stranger Things.

01:17:59.970 --> 01:18:00.289
It was good.

01:18:00.369 --> 01:18:01.409
It wasn't too hard to follow.

01:18:01.569 --> 01:18:06.289
Yeah, it's not that it's hard to follow, it's just a ripoff of like every 80s movie ever.

01:18:07.250 --> 01:18:08.050
What are you talking about?

01:18:09.170 --> 01:18:12.609
The first two seasons of Stranger Things is all I got through.

01:18:12.930 --> 01:18:14.289
I didn't see the last three.

01:18:15.170 --> 01:18:16.050
Dude, it's great.

01:18:16.289 --> 01:18:16.609
Really?

01:18:16.769 --> 01:18:17.729
Yeah, I like it a lot.

01:18:18.210 --> 01:18:19.729
Especially Faut was good.

01:18:19.809 --> 01:18:21.649
Especially when they make the commies the bad guys again.

01:18:24.210 --> 01:18:26.210
Um, where are we at on time?

01:18:27.970 --> 01:18:28.529
849.

01:18:28.930 --> 01:18:29.729
849?

01:18:30.210 --> 01:18:31.170
What time did we start?

01:18:31.409 --> 01:18:32.210
A while ago.

01:18:32.449 --> 01:18:32.769
Did we?

01:18:32.930 --> 01:18:33.729
Yeah, I think.

01:18:35.649 --> 01:18:39.729
It says right up there, it says right up there the the time.

01:18:40.529 --> 01:18:42.449
How long we've been recording.

01:18:43.170 --> 01:18:44.369
One hour and eighteen minutes.

01:18:44.609 --> 01:18:45.569
One hour and eighteen minutes.

01:18:45.729 --> 01:18:47.569
Oh wow, that felt like 20 minutes.

01:18:47.729 --> 01:18:48.529
I know, right?

01:18:49.569 --> 01:18:50.930
This is what it's like at work.

01:18:51.170 --> 01:18:52.689
When it's like you're still here?

01:18:52.930 --> 01:18:54.689
Oh shit, I got stuff to do.

01:18:57.250 --> 01:18:59.010
There's poop coming out of ceilings.

01:18:59.970 --> 01:19:01.809
Oh, by the way, Harley, I need a plunger.

01:19:03.649 --> 01:19:07.809
Um I I reckon we'll we'll call it quits on this one then.

01:19:07.970 --> 01:19:08.449
Wait a second.

01:19:08.529 --> 01:19:10.050
I want to hear Faith, what's your answer?

01:19:10.130 --> 01:19:11.250
If you had to eat a person.

01:19:11.489 --> 01:19:12.529
Oh yeah, yeah.

01:19:13.409 --> 01:19:15.250
Yeah, what no, no, no, no.

01:19:15.409 --> 01:19:18.050
No, you have it gun to your family's head.

01:19:18.850 --> 01:19:22.689
You have to just choose how it's prepared and then eaten half it.

01:19:22.769 --> 01:19:24.369
Like the same rule with the house, eat all the meat.

01:19:24.529 --> 01:19:28.210
The real question here isn't if you'll eat a person, you're gonna.

01:19:28.369 --> 01:19:30.850
We've moved past that gun.

01:19:33.170 --> 01:19:36.050
You could you can you can vomit afterwards.

01:19:36.130 --> 01:19:36.850
That's fine.

01:19:37.170 --> 01:19:40.210
Your childhood fears revolve around cannibalism.

01:19:41.409 --> 01:19:43.569
And I figured out it was because of the cannibalism thing.

01:19:43.649 --> 01:19:44.210
Yeah, no.

01:19:44.769 --> 01:19:45.970
But they're not people anymore.

01:19:46.449 --> 01:19:46.930
Big years.

01:19:47.010 --> 01:19:50.529
Also, it depends on which thing you're dipping up, because that's just a virus.

01:19:51.329 --> 01:19:54.050
Oh, I feel like zombies scare you.

01:19:54.289 --> 01:19:56.689
Yeah, they I okay so not a walking dead guy.

01:19:56.930 --> 01:20:04.689
First grade, so concerned I would like ration food up on my top bunk because I thought was like mind doomsday prepper over here.

01:20:05.489 --> 01:20:07.569
Yeah, you're feeding into the fear.

01:20:07.649 --> 01:20:10.130
She's like, My whole family's preparing for this.

01:20:10.210 --> 01:20:11.010
What do you mean?

01:20:12.289 --> 01:20:13.970
Same body horror of the kind of thing.

01:20:14.210 --> 01:20:15.970
Seven days to die scares the shit out of me.

01:20:16.050 --> 01:20:17.090
Like zombies do scare me.

01:20:17.170 --> 01:20:19.329
Like the movies, the game, but I like that.

01:20:19.489 --> 01:20:20.130
Yeah.

01:20:22.369 --> 01:20:23.090
Who's there?

01:20:23.329 --> 01:20:26.850
The only zombie movie that truly scared me was 28 Days Later.

01:20:27.010 --> 01:20:27.970
Dude, that one got me.

01:20:29.890 --> 01:20:30.050
No.

01:20:30.210 --> 01:20:30.850
It's fucking good.

01:20:30.930 --> 01:20:31.090
Yeah.

01:20:31.250 --> 01:20:33.970
Oh, dude, in like story, because it's 28 years later.

01:20:34.050 --> 01:20:37.489
So story wise, it's good.

01:20:37.729 --> 01:20:39.170
Yeah, I gotta, I gotta watch it.

01:20:39.329 --> 01:20:39.729
It's good.

01:20:39.809 --> 01:20:40.210
It's good.

01:20:40.369 --> 01:20:42.210
Because the second one, I didn't really care for the second one.

01:20:42.289 --> 01:20:49.809
I mean, it was it was fine, but I it was definitely a continuation, but the third one, oh dude, like like biological change.

01:20:50.050 --> 01:20:52.529
And they already have trailers for the fourth one, which is crazy.

01:20:52.609 --> 01:20:52.769
Yeah.

01:20:53.569 --> 01:20:54.369
Dude, I'm stoked.

01:20:54.529 --> 01:20:58.369
I'm like, that movie literally just came out and they're already prepping for the fourth.

01:20:58.689 --> 01:21:00.130
Did you ever see the movie Doomsday?

01:21:00.289 --> 01:21:01.090
Yeah, oh yeah, yeah.

01:21:01.250 --> 01:21:11.090
Where they like section off the island and stuff, and you've got like the two tribes, the one cannibalistic tribe, and then the the guys do like medieval, and you know, the cannibals are like punk rock or whatever.

01:21:11.329 --> 01:21:16.689
So they do the same thing, and 28 years later, you find out like, okay, we've quarantined uh island.

01:21:16.850 --> 01:21:18.689
Oh, it's fucking it's good.

01:21:18.850 --> 01:21:19.569
I'm gonna watch it.

01:21:19.649 --> 01:21:20.050
It's good.

01:21:20.130 --> 01:21:20.930
I like it a lot.

01:21:21.250 --> 01:21:22.769
So steak.

01:21:23.010 --> 01:21:23.329
Yes.

01:21:23.489 --> 01:21:25.409
What's your favorite food?

01:21:27.489 --> 01:21:28.449
Spaghettios.

01:21:33.010 --> 01:21:36.289
You you have to you have to find a way to stomach it.

01:21:38.850 --> 01:21:42.369
You're you're man.

01:21:44.369 --> 01:21:46.609
You guys are you guys are missing out.

01:21:50.529 --> 01:21:51.489
Doesn't work.

01:21:54.369 --> 01:21:57.329
Okay, like KFC kind of thing.

01:21:57.489 --> 01:21:58.210
Like if you found the bone.

01:22:00.529 --> 01:22:03.569
Like a chicken, a chicken vertebrae in my pot pie.

01:22:04.210 --> 01:22:05.170
I couldn't finish it.

01:22:05.409 --> 01:22:06.529
And I haven't gotten them since.

01:22:06.689 --> 01:22:13.729
Dude, I bit into a raw piece of chicken at an Applebee's and then asked if we could go back the next week.

01:22:14.850 --> 01:22:17.649
I was I was like, it's not gonna happen twice.

01:22:20.369 --> 01:22:22.130
So how how's it prepped?

01:22:22.449 --> 01:22:23.809
What's the meal?

01:22:25.409 --> 01:22:26.369
Harley pot pie?

01:22:28.210 --> 01:22:30.130
You know those like stuffed olives?

01:22:31.010 --> 01:22:31.170
Okay.

01:22:31.489 --> 01:22:31.729
Exactly.

01:22:31.809 --> 01:22:33.250
No, it'd have to be the grossest thing ever.

01:22:33.329 --> 01:22:36.609
I could never say because you're gonna focus on the olives and not the person.

01:22:37.569 --> 01:22:38.769
Yeah, stuffed olives.

01:22:39.010 --> 01:22:39.250
Okay.

01:22:40.609 --> 01:22:41.170
That is true.

01:22:41.250 --> 01:22:44.050
So you're gonna get a lot of food for a long time.

01:22:46.449 --> 01:22:47.409
That is true.

01:22:48.289 --> 01:23:03.809
See, uh for me, for me, maybe I just want to eat a person, but for me, I think of it in like terms of like if you present it in a way that I'm used to with the right seasonings, I would never know the difference.

01:23:04.769 --> 01:23:05.569
So well.

01:23:06.050 --> 01:23:09.970
Oh yeah, dude, I'm one documentary from left or right, it don't matter.

01:23:10.210 --> 01:23:19.729
You give me the right documentary, you give me the right flashy clip art, and I'm like, I guess I'm a liberal now.

01:23:22.369 --> 01:23:25.170
And it's just like a little sign that says take away the 19th Amendment.

01:23:25.649 --> 01:23:26.850
Yes, 100%.

01:23:27.250 --> 01:23:27.649
Yes.

01:23:27.809 --> 01:23:29.329
You you heard it here first, guys.

01:23:29.489 --> 01:23:32.529
My 16-year-old daughter thinks we should repeal the 19th Amendment.

01:23:32.769 --> 01:23:41.649
But also, like, if you just got me a mystery box and it was like inside this mystery box is your political affiliation, I'd be like, the mystery box decided, guys.

01:23:41.729 --> 01:23:42.850
I don't know what to tell you.

01:23:43.489 --> 01:23:44.850
Yes I'm a fascist, mate.

01:23:45.569 --> 01:23:51.649
You guys have those personality pets choose your own identity, so they're like, your gender, your sexuality, your political alignment.

01:23:51.809 --> 01:23:52.369
We'll just do that with you.

01:23:52.529 --> 01:23:52.609
Yeah.

01:23:54.289 --> 01:23:54.850
Yes.

01:23:56.130 --> 01:23:57.809
Son, I'm in, dude.

01:23:57.890 --> 01:23:58.609
I'm in, dude.

01:23:58.689 --> 01:24:03.409
Nate could shoot it with the cool like like around you, and all of a sudden you're wearing different clothes.

01:24:03.890 --> 01:24:05.010
Like a video game, dude.

01:24:08.369 --> 01:24:09.250
I think we got this.

01:24:09.489 --> 01:24:10.930
Dude, I'll do drag.

01:24:11.170 --> 01:24:11.409
Okay.

01:24:11.970 --> 01:24:13.329
I'm I'm writing these down.

01:24:13.409 --> 01:24:16.529
I'm putting these she writes all the crazy stuff we say down.

01:24:16.769 --> 01:24:31.409
We could not just us, but we could absolutely dude, we could full on do a spa day where Lindsay Lindsay decorates me, Faith decorates you, and we have barbershop gossip.

01:24:31.649 --> 01:24:32.850
Oh, dude.

01:24:34.369 --> 01:24:36.289
Did you hear that bitch Lindsay?

01:24:36.529 --> 01:24:37.649
Oh my god.

01:24:41.329 --> 01:24:43.729
Yes, we should do that and then put it on a billboard.

01:24:43.809 --> 01:24:44.050
Yes.

01:24:44.210 --> 01:24:45.010
Right outside your house.

01:24:45.250 --> 01:24:45.890
Yeah.

01:24:46.769 --> 01:24:48.529
Tune in for a good time.

01:24:50.850 --> 01:24:56.210
Well, like your challenge, 30 seconds long, but like no, dude, I'm in.

01:24:56.289 --> 01:24:56.930
I'll do that.

01:24:59.090 --> 01:25:01.970
You're talking about I tried to get you to do a blowjob class with me.

01:25:02.050 --> 01:25:03.809
I will do anything for humor.

01:25:04.210 --> 01:25:05.170
Literally anything.

01:25:05.489 --> 01:25:06.130
Context people.

01:25:06.210 --> 01:25:08.850
There was a there was a live show where we had a professional.

01:25:09.250 --> 01:25:09.890
Yeah, yeah.

01:25:10.050 --> 01:25:12.449
We weren't like we aren't we weren't searching it.

01:25:12.689 --> 01:25:16.769
It wasn't like no, she she didn't Google it on a computer or anything.

01:25:17.010 --> 01:25:19.170
She's on the spot.

01:25:19.250 --> 01:25:21.250
It was uh mind-blowing.

01:25:21.489 --> 01:25:23.250
No, I I'm all in on that.

01:25:23.409 --> 01:25:39.250
I also said another fun idea would be um, so we got my mom got Adam these bluey like sunglasses for Christmas, but they're like like super sunglassed sunglasses, so like you can't see your eyes on them.

01:25:39.569 --> 01:25:46.289
I said that we should wear those and play 20 or play blackjack 21.

01:25:47.569 --> 01:25:52.930
So like you have to keep a poker face while we tell horrible jokes to each other.

01:25:53.170 --> 01:25:54.369
Could we play Uno instead?

01:25:54.449 --> 01:25:55.010
That's fine too.

01:25:55.329 --> 01:25:57.329
I don't know how to play blackjack, that's fine.

01:25:59.329 --> 01:26:04.050
It's called like testing your poker face, and it'll be like generally associated with like you know guys know about your academia?

01:26:04.130 --> 01:26:09.649
Yes, there's so many bad audio clips of like this one specific gay ship, and it's just so cringy.

01:26:11.170 --> 01:26:13.809
It's super weird where you're like, what?

01:26:13.970 --> 01:26:15.970
Wait, there's a there's a gay boat.

01:26:16.769 --> 01:26:18.529
There's plenty of gay boats.

01:26:21.010 --> 01:26:24.689
Okay, they're full of I mess with her every time she says ship as like a term.

01:26:25.329 --> 01:26:29.489
I go a boat, a boat, they're full of semen.

01:26:29.970 --> 01:26:38.210
Ah, uh, uh, uh, oh I'm in.

01:26:38.289 --> 01:26:40.210
Okay, so you still haven't answered the question.

01:26:40.369 --> 01:26:42.289
This is how she wins her arguments at home.

01:26:42.529 --> 01:26:43.890
No, she said pickles or something.

01:26:44.050 --> 01:26:46.449
Oh, you're gonna stick with the stuffed olives.

01:26:47.729 --> 01:26:50.050
Don't worry, I'll pick up the rest of her all.

01:26:53.329 --> 01:26:55.649
I'll be like, is there any seconds of Steve?

01:26:55.809 --> 01:26:58.609
I'm really set on the name Steve lately.

01:26:59.409 --> 01:27:00.850
Is it because he's skinny?

01:27:01.010 --> 01:27:02.369
Steve works with us.

01:27:02.689 --> 01:27:03.250
Does he?

01:27:03.489 --> 01:27:04.130
Who's Steve?

01:27:04.449 --> 01:27:05.809
Imaginary character in the casual.

01:27:06.130 --> 01:27:07.090
Oh, that guy.

01:27:09.250 --> 01:27:10.930
Carl's another great name.

01:27:11.170 --> 01:27:11.569
Carl.

01:27:11.809 --> 01:27:14.529
If I was gonna eat somebody, it would be a one-eyed coral.

01:27:14.689 --> 01:27:15.569
That's a good question for you.

01:27:15.649 --> 01:27:19.170
If you have if you were you're gonna eat somebody, what do you want his name to be?

01:27:19.409 --> 01:27:20.609
Why are you assuming it's a guy?

01:27:21.809 --> 01:27:22.930
I'm not gonna eat a lady.

01:27:23.090 --> 01:27:24.609
I want to get fed.

01:27:25.489 --> 01:27:28.130
Yeah, I don't know, man.

01:27:28.369 --> 01:27:30.769
I wanna I want to leave with a full belly.

01:27:31.090 --> 01:27:34.449
He had to have a name, besides somebody has to cook the food.

01:27:36.289 --> 01:27:37.970
Wait a second, wait a second.

01:27:38.289 --> 01:27:40.130
So is it like just a card thing?

01:27:40.369 --> 01:27:43.090
Like you get a name, no pictures, just a name and a backstory.

01:27:43.250 --> 01:27:44.769
Oh no, no, there's gonna be a picture.

01:27:44.930 --> 01:27:46.689
No, I want you to see his family.

01:27:46.769 --> 01:27:49.409
Uh no, no, I'm gonna pick someone who doesn't like my luck.

01:27:49.489 --> 01:27:50.850
I'll be eating a meth head.

01:27:51.409 --> 01:27:52.050
Oh, yeah.

01:27:52.930 --> 01:27:53.970
That's true.

01:27:54.850 --> 01:27:56.529
It's basically the same.

01:27:57.409 --> 01:27:59.170
I think you can cook the meth out of it.

01:28:01.489 --> 01:28:04.449
Chat, can you cook can you cook meth out of somebody's system?

01:28:04.689 --> 01:28:06.050
That's a good question.

01:28:06.850 --> 01:28:18.449
Um, imagine like you you get like a picture of them with their wife and their kids, and they're smiling, looking at you, and their name.

01:28:18.850 --> 01:28:21.250
Okay, but here's the plot twist.

01:28:21.409 --> 01:28:23.890
They're a horrible, horrible human being.

01:28:23.970 --> 01:28:25.569
Like they've done something super dirty.

01:28:25.890 --> 01:28:26.769
This is a dexter thing.

01:28:26.930 --> 01:28:30.369
Yeah, like their backstory is gonna be all of the crimes they've committed.

01:28:30.689 --> 01:28:33.170
Oh jigsaw, yeah.

01:28:33.569 --> 01:28:34.210
Yeah, yeah.

01:28:34.449 --> 01:28:37.250
Yeah, this is a jigsaw moment, but you have to eat them.

01:28:37.649 --> 01:28:39.809
Oh, well, then I can't I can't pick a name.

01:28:40.289 --> 01:28:41.010
Oh, I would.

01:28:41.090 --> 01:28:42.050
I'll tell you after.

01:28:45.409 --> 01:28:46.930
So that's fair.

01:28:47.729 --> 01:28:49.890
I'm married the same way.

01:28:51.250 --> 01:28:51.970
Okay, chat.

01:28:52.050 --> 01:28:52.529
You heard this.

01:28:52.609 --> 01:28:56.529
My 16-year-old daughter, if you need 16 16-year-old boys andor girls out there.

01:28:56.689 --> 01:29:00.369
You know, we better not have any 16-year-olds listening to this show.

01:29:01.890 --> 01:29:02.769
Just turn it off.

01:29:02.930 --> 01:29:05.489
Our demographic is far higher.

01:29:06.130 --> 01:29:06.689
All right.

01:29:07.090 --> 01:29:09.329
Well, I think it's time to call it.

01:29:09.409 --> 01:29:11.170
It's it's been it's been a little bit.

01:29:11.489 --> 01:29:12.130
It's been.

01:29:13.409 --> 01:29:14.930
And I know you guys gotta get home.

01:29:15.090 --> 01:29:15.329
Yeah.

01:29:16.130 --> 01:29:16.930
All right, guys.

01:29:17.090 --> 01:29:24.289
This has been off the record track parkour base one, part two.

01:29:25.010 --> 01:29:26.529
Electric Boogaloo.

01:29:28.289 --> 01:29:30.130
Sir, just second thought.

01:29:31.809 --> 01:29:33.090
It's been real.

01:29:33.649 --> 01:29:35.090
Face everybody.

01:29:38.210 --> 01:29:42.050
Thanks for listening to the Lincoln Bridge Podcast.